Ichiban
by damoon
Summary: One shot stories from the point of view of the Tomoeda Jr.High students all centered around a fairytale dance. Sakura,Naoko,Takashi,Meiling, and Tomoyo have told their stories and now it's Eriol's turn. How will it end? Ah... Love is grand & sappy too.
1. Sakura, Syaoran and a 4 leaf clover

Disclaimer: CCS is not owned by me but by the lovely ladies of CLAMP.   
  
This story was inspired by the manga and a dash of a doujinshi I read. It was cute and sweet. Ichiban means "number one" or "Most" or "best" or any other words that come close to that. This word is present in Card Captor Sakura a lot. And it's such a very sweet word isn't it?  
  
*Mushy, mushy, mushy*  
  
***********  
::An Notes:: This is Sakura's story. She's the main character and so she goes first right? This one isn't OOC I don't think. It's goop though. And most of these stories will be so that's a warning for you all.  
  
***********  
  
~ Ichiban~  
  
  
Sakura's Story #1  
  
  
Sometimes when I think of you so far away, I remember the times when you were  
still here. I always wished that I realized it sooner. Your feelings for me and my  
feelings for you. I was so naive and so clueless. Everyone saw, except for me and I  
still feel so bad about that. But I'm glad. I'm so glad that I told you how I felt finally  
although you had to go away so soon.  
  
My heart hurt so much when I realized that you had to leave. And I cried because I  
was afraid I would never see you again. That was so hard for me to take. No. It was  
too painful.  
  
"I'm going back to Hong Kong..." Those were your words.. And those were the  
words that broke my heart.  
  
But it was because of Tomoyo-chan and everyone else that made me realize that it  
won't be the end for you and me. If we believed in our feelings and I really do  
believe in them. That's why I know, no matter how long it will take, I know you will  
come back and I will be here waiting. Forever.  
  
Your phone calls and letters always make me smile you know that? I like listening to   
you talk about your training and about school. And then you listen to me talk on  
and on about Tomoyo-chan and everyone, oniichan and my awful understanding of  
math.  
  
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bore you. It's just that I really, REALLY hate math.  
Polygons, A+X=24, quadratic angles... I'm going crazy..."  
  
"You're still having Math problems, huh?" you asked concerned.  
  
"It's ok though, Oniichan helps me. Although he has no patience." I paused,  
thinking. "You know, he reminds me of you..."  
  
There was a sound of shock in your line. "Ehhh... If he hears you saying that, he'll  
have a fit. Then he'll yell something about me being some Gaki and asks why you're  
still talking to me."  
  
I laughed. "You know, he probably will say that."  
  
"But it's not as bad as carrying a big old Chinese dictionary just to read a Japanese  
text book.... But Sakura... I won't mind carrying my dictionary again. It's not so  
heavy."  
  
I smile. You always manage to make me smile during the moments I feel like  
crying. And I was going to cry because I knew the phone call was going to end  
sooner or later.   
  
"Be genki as ever, OK?" you said to me.  
  
"Of course," I said.  
  
"I miss you Sakura. Daisuki."  
  
"Daisuki..."  
  
I listened to the dialtone for a moment after we said our good-byes. I wished that  
you were here so we can talk forever and as I put the phone down, I think about more memories of back then. Of you and everyone when we were still going to Tomoeda Elementary. Those years were fun, weren't they?  
  
An unexpected thing happened one morning you know. It was afternoon actually.  
Tomoyo-chan and I were looking at a poster of a dance they were holding for all the  
newcomers of Tomoeda Jr. High.   
  
"A dance Sakura-chan. It'll be fun. Naoko-chan and Chiharu-chan said they were  
going too. What do you think?"  
  
I agreed. It might be fun. I've never been to a dance before. I was planning to go  
with Tomoyo-chan and Naoko-chan but something happened.  
  
On my way home, I decided to stop by at the Penguin park. I don't know why.  
Maybe just for memory's sake I guess.  
  
"Kinomoto..." I was startled at first. I was so lost in my own thoughts that I didn't  
even notice that someone else was there with me.  
  
"Tsukada-kun?" I was surprised. He lived in the opposite direction from me.  
Tsukada Kyoichi. Do you remember him? He used to be in our 5th grade class.   
  
"I tried to catch up with you and I called to you but you didn't seem to hear me."  
He said.  
  
"Oh... I'm sorry. I guess I was just thinking too much." I smiled at him and he  
smiled back.  
  
He shook his head. "No it's OK." For awhile he didn't say anything. But he looked at  
me and said something I've never expected. "Kinomoto, will you go to the dance  
with me?"   
  
It took a while for me to register it. Tsukada Kyoichi-kun. He is a really nice person.  
He said those words so sincerely and so honest. He asked me if I can be his girlfriend. He said he likes me... But I couldn't.  
  
"I'm sorry Tsukada-kun..." The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt anyone. And  
though he was smiling I can tell from his eyes I did hurt him a little bit. "I already  
like someone else... I..."  
  
"I completely understand. It didn't hurt to try.... That person is very lucky. Will he  
be going to the dance with you?"  
  
I shook my head. "He lives far away for now. Though sometimes I wish he was  
here..." I shook my head again. "I'm sorry, I had no reason to tell you that."  
  
"It's all right," he said to me. "Will you still be at the dance though? With  
Daidouji-tachi?"  
  
"I don't know... Maybe"  
  
"It'll be fun..."  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
"Well, if you do go, even if I'm not the one you like... Will you still save a dance for  
me?"  
  
I nodded. Dancing with someone else won't be so bad will it?  
  
"I really wish you can come with us, Syaoran-kun," I said to you over the phone.  
"The theme is called 'Fairytales'. So you're supposed to dress up as someone who  
lived Happily Ever After."  
  
"I'm pretty sure Daidouji already has a costume made up for you..." You laughed.  
  
For some reason that made me sad. "I don't think I will go."  
  
You sounded concerned. "What? Why?"  
  
"I just wish you were here to dance with me, Syaoran-kun...." I surprised myself.  
Did I just say that? I blinked away some tears that were about to fall. Why was I  
about to cry, out of all things?  
  
"Sakura, are you OK? Sakura..."  
  
"Syaoran-kun, I'm sorry. I'm OK... I think I'm being selfish. I know you can't be  
here right now..." I hesitated to say anything more. "Ummm, I think Otousan is  
calling me..." I lied. "I'll talk to you later OK? I miss you."  
  
"Me too, Sakura..."  
  
I think you were about to say something but I didn't want to hear it. I couldn't hear  
it. Or else I'd cry. I just feel lonely. Can a 13 year old feel lonely without her friend?  
The one she loves most? Yes, I think so. It's almost been two years and 4 months.  
  
You called me the next day and told me not to get sad. And I denied that I was.  
  
"Do you remember that story Yamazaki told us about that four leaf clover? That if  
you find one it will bring happiness..."  
  
"And we all decided to look for one all over the school grounds." I finished for you.  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
Yes, I remembered that day. I remembered a lot of things concerning you and me.  
Why was I so completely clueless?  
  
That day, Tomoyo-chan and I were looking for four leaf clovers and I was planning  
to give it to Yukito-san. Ha. I was still so fascinated with Yukito-san then. But, I saw  
you... And you were looking for one too but with no luck. So I gave you mine. I  
remember that clearly now. You were so surprised Syaoran-kun. And you were  
blushing.  
  
And then the next day you came over to my house to give it back to me. "I don't want it," you told me. "It's yours. I can't keep it." I started to cry. Did you hate me that much? "You keep it safe..." You told me before running away.  
  
I cried more you know. Why would you give it back to me? Later on though, I  
realized why. Why you did that. That story Yamazaki-kun was talking about. It said  
that if you find a four leaf clover and keep it safe you will be happy forever and you  
wanted me to be happy. Tomoyo-chan told me that when you wish on it before its  
green color fades, your wish will come true. Do you think that's true?  
  
"I wanted you to be happy forever, Sakura and I still do." You said.  
  
I opened the book I kept that clover I found. I already made my wish  
and its green color already faded. Someday, that wish will come true. I feel it.  
Almost like I feel those auras.  
  
"Sakura-chan, I made the perfect costume for you. Just for the dance."  
Tomoyo-chan said with a happy sigh and sparkling eyes. "Oh, it will be so kawaii! I  
haven't said those words in so long." Tomoyo-chan sighed again and handed me a  
pale blue dress with lace and ruffles and tulle and a train to boot. But despite that  
description, it was a beautiful dress. "It's Aurora-hime from Sleeping Beauty..." She  
added with more sparkles from her eyes. "I'm so happy that I can dress up the  
kawaii Sakura again."  
  
I sighed. I guess some thing's never change, huh? "Thank-you Tomoyo-chan. It's  
beautiful. But... but I'm not sure I want to go."   
  
"But Sakura-chan, you have to go. None of us have been to a dance before and you  
look so kawaii and Li-kun said that he always wants you to be happy. And I  
guarantee that you will be happy if you come. I'm almost positive about it. And  
Naoko-chan and Chiharu-chan will be disappointed if you don't come."  
  
Ahh... so Tomoyo-chan convinced me to go and you know what? I did have fun. I  
didn't feel so sad. I danced with Tsukada-kun because I promised him and even  
Yamazaki-kun too. Did you know? Did I tell you? He dressed up as Snow White  
while Chiharu-chan was the Prince. It was so funny. It almost reminded me of that  
play we did in 5th grade. You were Aurora-hime then. You looked so kawaii. But  
then... but then.. could it be? I felt an aura. I felt your aura. But I knew it was just  
my imagination. I just missed you too much. Even when I'm happy Syaoran-kun, I  
will still be sad sometimes because you're not beside me. But that aura... I felt it at  
the dance. I felt it when Tomoyo-chan and I walked home. I felt it when she said  
good-bye and we parted.  
  
"Sakura-chan, you don't know how much I want to have my camera with me now.  
But I made a promise..." And with that, she giggled and as if by magic a limo was  
there to pick her up.  
  
Tomoyo-chan, I don't think she will ever change. And I hope she never will.  
  
But your aura Syaoran-kun, it was so strong. My heart felt so at ease. I didn't know  
why I took that detour to the park that night. Maybe it was for those good old  
memories sake again. I didn't even realize... No wonder...  
  
I couldn't make myself believe it at first. It can't be... My heart skipped.  
  
"Syaoran-kun?" It was all I could muster. There you were. Standing by the Penguin  
slide wearing a Prince costume.  
  
"I'm sorry I couldn't make it to the dance. My flight got delayed. I... I.."  
  
I was so happy I ran to you and hugged you and I didn't even make you finish.  
"Syaoran-kun... Why?"  
  
"Because the last thing I ever want to do is make you sad. And you sounded lonely  
Sakura. That's why I'm here."  
  
I couldn't believe it. It was you. It was actually you. You were still the same. With  
hair as messy as always and those familiar eyes, that smile. It was you. My friend...  
The one I love most of all.  
  
"I'm so happy to see you again, Sakura." You said as we separated from our hug.  
You held out your hand to me. "Now, how about a dance, my Hime?"  
  
We danced. It was so nice. So perfect. Even without music it really did feel like a  
fairytale. "I'm so happy to see you again too, Syaoran-kun."  
  
"You know, you look a lot better as Aurora-hime than I ever will. I don't think I'll  
ever forget that horrible play." There was laughter in you voice. I missed that voice.   
  
You were only with me for a day but you made me realize that loneliness should  
never surpass happiness. I felt like a new person. I will always miss you and some  
days I will be sad but more than likely because of you and because of everyone I  
will be happy.  
  
"When I come back again, I will stay for good." You said before you stepped foot on  
that bus to get to the airport. "I promise."  
  
I hugged the Syaoran bear you gave me and smiled. "And I will wait," I answered.  
  
"I...I..." you started to say. Your face began to turn crimson, Syaoran-kun. You will  
never change too. And because of that... "I love you Sakura... You are the one that  
I will always love best." You made my heart skip again when you kissed me. My  
first kiss. It was a soft kiss. A nice kiss. "Sakura... you should always smile and  
never change. I'll call you when I get back, OK? I miss you already." Your face  
turned crimson again and you went inside the bus.  
  
Syaoran-kun, I hope you always smile too. And don't ever change. Your scowl, your  
glares with my brother, your kind nature. Your red face... because of that and  
because of everything... "I love you too Syaoran-kun!" I called, as the your bus  
drove away.  
  
END... 


	2. Naoko, a fairy tale and the stars

Disclaimer: CCS is not owned by me but by the lovely ladies of CLAMP.   
  
Naoko's Story...  
  
  
**************  
Author's Notes: This is my (lame) attempt to write a Naoko story. Sorry if it may  
sound OOC but Naoko is one of the least rounded supporting characters of CCS. I  
mean everyone knows that Chiharu has this cute relationship with Takashi and Rika  
has a relationship with Terada-sensei but how about dear Naoko-chan? She wasn't  
even featured in the last volume of the Manga where everyone was there to help  
out Sakura when she was heartbroken because Syaoran told her that he was going  
back to Hong Kong. That wasn't right. She should at least get a nice ending, ne?  
So for all those Naoko fans out there who also likes reading shoujo manga but at  
the same time just loves UFOs and Ghost stories this is for you....  
  
Just to let you know though, you do have to read Sakura's story first to get this one  
^_^  
  
********************  
  
~Ichiban~  
  
"The Tomoeda school dance. Friday," Chiharu-chan read the poster aloud. "The  
theme will be, 'Fairy Tales'. Dress up as a character who lived Happily Ever After."  
  
The first school dance of the year. The one that starts my whole Jr.High career. 'It'll  
be fun!' Chiharu-chan told me. And Tomoyo-chan and Sakura-chan thought so too.  
And as the days went by and as it got closer to the dance, I was getting excited....  
A dance. A dance was something I've never been to before. I always wondered what  
it would feel like to dance with someone you like and someone who likes you back.  
It would be so romantic. Just like the characters of my many shoujo manga.  
  
But... but I don't think that will ever happen to me. You know, someone I like,  
liking me back. That kind of thing is best left to the novels I read and the stories I  
write. It's one of the reasons why I like horror stories and ghosts stories so much.  
At least in those stories the characters don't make you feel lonely about not having  
someone.  
  
I think about that sometimes. It seems everyone has someone but me.  
Chiharu-chan for example, has Yamazaki-kun. Rika-chan has someone special and  
Sakura-chan will forever be with Li-kun no matter how far apart they are and  
Tomoyo-chan? Well, I'm pretty sure Tomoyo-chan has someone special too. And  
that leaves me. Yanagisawa Naoko. I am alone. I've been alone for awhile.  
  
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have someone special. Mizuki-sensei  
once said that it's a wonderful feeling. Your heart flutters. Your stomach has  
butterflies and there's always that warm feeling of something that makes you feel  
all happy inside.  
  
"Is something wrong?" I looked up to see Yamazaki-kun standing in front of my  
desk with a worried crease on his forehead. "You look a little sad. You know, there  
was a book that said that if you're sad, all you have to do is turn around and around  
three times and laugh as loud as you can and then all the sad stuff will fall away.  
  
"Yamazaki-kun, I don't think it's that easy."  
  
He contemplated the thought for a moment but agreed with me. "I guess you're  
right." he sighed. "But is there anything I can do?"  
  
I shook my head. "It's nothing really. Thank-you for worrying though."  
  
I don't think I'm sad. Not really, anyway. I just feel left out sometimes. Like I'm not  
part of the crowd. I feel like that whenever I look at Chiharu-chan and  
Yamazaki-kun and when I look at Rika-chan's pretty smile whenever she mentions  
Terada-sensei and Sakura-chan's light blush whenever she secretly reads one of  
Li-kun's letters that she hides in between the pages of her math book, so she can  
read it instead of solving math problems.  
  
I laid my head on my hand and wondered when it will be my turn. I wish it'll be  
soon. It would be nice to talk to someone and laugh with someone about the latest  
horror movie. I wonder if anyone is even interested in stuff like that other than me.   
  
Last year, in sixth grade, I talked to Tsukada-kun a lot. He shared the same  
interests as me and he was really nice. I never really thought of him as cute or  
handsome. He was just there. He looked a lot like Yamazaki-kun to tell you the  
truth. Except he has messy black hair and pretty eyes.  
  
In English class, we got in trouble plenty of times because all we would do was  
talked and never listened. I think the both of us gained some muscles carrying  
those buckets out in the hall almost every week. Yamazaki-kun said that we were  
perfect for each other because he said he never found anyone who got along so  
well.  
  
We both scoffed off Yamazaki-kun's comment though. I already knew that  
Tsukada-kun liked someone else back then. And me? Well, I liked someone else too.  
  
It's really not important who I liked. It was just a crush thing. It was nothing  
special. But Tsukada-kun... he made me feel like smiling. I never felt my heart  
pitter patter for him then, but now....   
  
That year, my Oba-san moved away from Tomoeda and decided to live in the  
Philippines. She asked me if I can help her move and because of that I had to leave  
school a week earlier than everyone before it let out for summer vacation. I was  
happy about that... although I couldn't do something with Chiharu-chan tachi for  
the whole summer.   
  
"I can't believe you're going, Yanagisawa. Your aunt can't wait until next week to  
move?" Tsukada-kun asked during English class. He laid his head on the table  
looking at me with a somewhat disappointed look on his face.   
  
"No. That's why she wants me to come so I can help her move. But I can't wait. I've  
never been to another country before. It might be fun."   
  
"But you don't even know how to speak the language."  
  
"But I can always learn."  
  
He sighed. "I guess so."  
  
I looked at him. I wasn't expecting him to have the reaction he was having. It  
almost seemed like he didn't want me to go. "Who would I talk to then, when  
you're gone?" He asked sadly.  
  
"You can always talk to Yamazaki-kun."  
  
"Yeah.... but... but it's not the same..."  
  
I will always remember his exact words. Although Chiharu-chan tachi are my best  
friends, what Tsukada-kun said was the nicest thing anyone ever said to me. He  
would actually miss talking to me? To think about it now, I missed talking to him  
too.   
  
But that was then and it was the end. He was my friend but nothing more. By the  
time we got to Jr. High, Tsukada-kun wasn't in my homeroom and so we didn't talk  
anymore. Sometimes I would see him passing by my locker in the hallway and we  
would say "Hi" and that was it.   
  
I miss talking to him. He liked horror stories as much as I did and all things to do  
with UFOs and aliens. Maybe there's something wrong with me. All of a sudden, I've  
been thinking of Tsukada-kun a lot. Whenever I see him, my heart starts to pound  
and I get nervous. What's wrong with me?  
  
Tomoyo-chan giggled behind me when Tsukada-kun passed me in the hallway after  
school.   
  
I turned around to look at her. "What?" I asked. "Is something wrong?"  
Tomoyo-chan can be so strange sometimes.   
  
Tomoyo-chan giggled again. "Naoko-chan... Now I know what your fairy tale will  
be." She smiled at me knowingly.  
  
"W-what are you talking about?" I asked.  
  
"You should ask him, Naoko-chan. He is a friend right? And I remembered you  
would talk to him all the time last year." Tomoyo-chan looked at her watch then  
and put a hand on her cheek. "Oh my, I'm late. I have to go." She waved good-bye  
to me and ran the opposite direction of the hall.  
  
I sighed. Tomoyo-chan is very observant. She's been that way since I met her. I  
sighed again. Maybe Tomoyo-chan was right. Maybe I should go ask Tsukada-kun. I  
wouldn't hurt right? If he says no, I guess it would be all right. And so I ran after  
him. He wasn't so far ahead of me. I saw him walking towards the Penguin King  
park.  
  
The park was a place I used to play at when I was younger. It was always the best  
place to talk and run around in. And every spring, the sakura trees that surrounded  
it was always in full bloom and falling sakura was everywhere. Even though I live in  
the opposite direction of the park, I sometimes go there just to look at the sakura.  
Maybe that was why Tsukada-kun was there too.   
  
I felt nervous. I never asked someone to a dance before. But there was no turning  
back now. I was never one to turn back on anything anyway. So I took a deep  
breath. "Tsu... Tsukada-kun..." I started to say. But I was too late. I don't think  
they saw me. Or heard me....   
  
So that was why he was the park...  
  
"Kinomoto, will you go to the dance with me?" I heard Tsukada-kun ask.  
  
I knew from before, that Tsukada-kun liked Sakura-chan a lot so I wasn't really  
surprised when I saw them. Sakura-chan... She told him that she already has the  
person she likes best so she turned him down gently. I turned away after that and  
decided to walk home.  
  
There was that lonely feeling inside me again. Do you know that feeling? That  
feeling like someone is pulling and kicking and squeezing your heart out. Your chest  
starts to hurt and you feel like you want to cry.   
  
I'll admit that I like Tsukada-kun. I always wondered what would have happened if I  
didn't go with my Oba-san last year. Would it be different? Would he have liked me  
the same as I like him? Maybe it's me. I'm not exactly the beautiful one or the cute  
one or the pretty one among my friends. I'm just Nao-chan. That's all. Sometimes,  
I even wonder if I will end up like the ladies in some of my manga where they  
would just wait forever for a boy to come their way and they all end up being old  
and bitter. I don't think I ever want to be that way.  
  
All I wanted then was just go to the dance to get rid of the loneliness I was feeling.  
Yes, just go to the dance with Chiharu-chan and Yamazaki-kun and I'll be fine. "You  
have to dress up as someone who lived happily ever after..." Chiharu-chan said  
again. "Who will you be, Naoko-chan?"  
  
I shrugged. "I don't know yet."  
  
"You don't know yet? But it's only 2 days away."  
  
"Yeah, I know..." I said, sounding glum. But I wasn't glum. Really I wasn't.  
  
"Naoko-chan... Maybe you should be Cinderella. It would be perfect," Tomoyo-chan  
piped up.   
  
"Cinderella... You would be a beautiful Cinderella," said Sakura-chan. She gave me  
one of her trademark Sakura-chan smiles but it seemed to me that something was  
wrong behind that smile of hers.  
  
"Who will you be dressed as, Sakura-chan?" I asked.  
  
Her smile faded then and she looked away. "Ummm... I... I don't think I'm going."  
She bowed to us. "Ummm... ummm... I'm sorry. I have to get going. Otousan is  
probably wondering where I am."  
  
"Ahh... I think it must be about Li-kun," Chiharu-chan said as we all looked after  
Sakura-chan's running form.  
  
"I'm pretty sure it is. She must really miss him," I said.  
  
You know, I may like horror stories and UFOs and aliens, but I am a hopeless  
romantic. I guess that's what reading so much shoujo manga can do to you. Lately  
I've been thinking about many things.... I wonder if someday, I'll meet someone  
that will like me... I wonder if there is a fairy tale out there for me. Someday, I wish  
it will happen. To live "happily ever after" would be... would be great. But I do know  
that some stories don't end so happily.   
  
Tsukada-kun may not like me and it may take awhile for me to find my most  
important person but I guess I can wait. I hope it won't be too long. Onegai... Don't  
make it too long.  
  
I went to the dance with Chiharu-chan and Yamazaki-kun. I still  
can't believe he agreed to dress up as Snow White. "It's not funny," he said. "Just  
because I lost."  
  
I was Cinderella after all. Everyone was there and everyone danced with everyone  
else. And as they danced, I decided to go outside for awhile and watch the  
stars.Tomoeda Jr. High has this large backyard. As large and spacey as a soccer  
field put together with a baseball field. I like it there especially at night when you  
can look up and see the pretty night sky and the stars that are scattered all over  
the horizon. I thought I saw a shooting star.... I'm hardly ever that lucky though.  
So just looking up at them was good enough for me.  
  
So maybe I have to wait a little longer to find the one that I love most. But I guess  
I can live with it. Someday, if I keep my heart open, I'll surely find that person and  
hopefully that person will love me the best too. "It would be so romantic," I said  
aloud with a happy sigh. Ahh... just thinking about it is wonderful.  
  
"What would be so romantic, Yanagisawa?"  
  
I turned around. Tsukada-kun was watching me curiously and I felt my face getting  
warmer. "Ahhhh.... it's nothing. I was just thinking."  
  
He stood beside me then and looked up at the stars too. "So why aren't you dancing  
inside?"  
  
"I think I'll just watch the stars for awhile." I gave him a small smile.  
  
"Aa..." he said.  
  
"Why aren't you dancing?" I asked.  
  
It took awhile for him to answer. "I just realized that dancing with a friend is a lot  
different than dancing with someone that you care about the most.... It's nice  
dancing with a friend but dancing with the one you like is even better. Onee-chan  
used to tell me that."  
  
"But isn't Sakura-chan the one you like the most?"  
  
"I thought I did for the longest time... It took me until tonight to realize that I was  
wrong." He smiled at me and continued. "We haven't talked for a long time,  
Yanagisawa. Have you written any stories lately?"  
  
"I did. But you probably don't want to read it."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because it's not a horror story. It's... It's too sappy I think."  
  
He smiled again. "Anything you write, Yanagisawa, I'll read. Even if it is sappy as  
you say it is.... What is it about anyway?"  
  
"It's nothing really. It just about this girl who is looking for that special someone  
but so far she can't find him."  
  
"But in the end, she does find him eventually right?"  
  
"I don't know yet..."  
  
"Well, I hope so. Everyone should have someone that they care about the most..."  
  
We stayed outside for what seemed like an eternity. Well, at least that's what  
Yamazaki-kun said. But to me, it didn't feel like that at all. I wanted to be there all  
night just talking to Tsukada-kun. It was just like old times again.  
  
I don't really know if Tsukada-kun is the one I like the most yet. I am just his  
friend after all... Yet, something about him always makes me feel happy. For some  
people like Chiharu-chan and Sakura-chan it's easy. From the very start, it seemed  
they always had a Prince. But for some people like me, I guess it will take awhile  
for anything to happen.   
  
Love is unpredictable sometimes. That's what Mizuki-sensei said too. You never  
know when it will happen.   
  
Maybe I'll write a story one day about how unpredictable love is and how if it ever  
happens it's a wonderful feeling... Your heart flutters, your stomach has butterflies  
and you feel all happy inside. I think... I think I feel that way when I am with  
Tsukada-kun now.   
  
The End....  
  
**********  
Author's Notes:  
  
So who will be next? Hmmm....  
  
How did Yamazaki-kun end up dressing as Snow White anyway?  
Where was Tomoyo going when she said she was going to be late?  
Where the heck is Rika-chan?  
And What about Syaoran's take on it?  
And Mizuki-sensei saying that love is unpredictable? Do you think she's right???  
  
I choose the Philippines out of all places to have Naoko-chan's   
Oba-san move to because it's the only other island that is near Japan. And it's only   
a short distance away from plane.   
  
This story is somewhat autobiographical. I hoped it didn't sound too OOC. I just feel sorry for Naoko because she needs someone too. Everyone in Tomoeda Elementary has someone to love except for Naoko and I hope she'll find one soon ^_^  
  
'Til next time ^_^ 


	3. Takashi and his life

Disclaimer: CCS is not owned by me but by the lovely ladies of CLAMP.   
  
Takashi's Story...  
  
  
**************  
Author's Notes: Finally my Yamazaki-kun story. Hmmm... I hope it doesn't sound  
too OOC. Yamazaki is such a nice boy and so polite. But when he starts those lies  
he just cracks me up. Well, hope you enjoy. Seems.. like every chapter I write   
keeps getting longer and longer.   
  
********************  
  
~Ichiban~  
  
I think everything started when I was about five. It was May. Close to my birthday.  
Otousan and I were at the park watching the ducks wading in the pond, when all of  
a sudden he said something to me just out of the blue.  
  
Now, my Otousan was always such a serious person. Much like Li-kun sometimes. It  
wasn't like him to joke around. Everything he said to me, I believed.  
  
"Takashi-kun," he said looking up at the blue sky. "Why do you think the sky is  
blue?"  
  
"Isn't it because of the reflection of the sun, Otousan?"  
  
Otousan looked at me with closed eyes and a smiling face, which left me confused.  
"Am I wrong, Otousan? That's what I read from those books you gave me."   
  
"Ahh... Yes, yes... Takashi-kun," he said, holding up his pointer finger as if to make  
a point. "But there's another story to it. Do you want to hear it?"  
  
I nodded with enthusiasm. Otousan was one of the smartest people I knew so I  
knew he couldn't be wrong at these things.  
  
And so he continued. "You see, a long time ago, the gods in heaven were all great  
painters. And they would paint and paint all day and all night long. And the paint  
was always blue because back then that was the only color. And when they were  
done painting, they would throw the paint away high up in the colorless sky and  
soon the paint mixed with the clouds and the sky eventually turned blue."   
  
Back then, I was amazed. Wow! The sky became blue because all the god were  
painters.   
  
When Otousan saw my face full of wide amazement he started to laugh... One of  
those hearty laughs that only fathers can do when they are truly amused.  
"Takashi-kun," he finally said, catching his breath. "I hope you always make  
everyone laugh."  
  
For my birthday that year, he gave me a thick book full of facts about everything  
you can possibly imagine. Like why do trees exist, why we have hair, why we  
breath. I was mesmerized by it. Me being six, was supposed to be interested in  
baseball and kendo and watching the latest anime on lazy Sunday afternoons.... but  
no... I was so into the book. Facts were a lot better. "Use it well, Takashi-kun."  
Otousan said.   
  
For most of my life, that book became one of my precious pocessions. Anything  
Otousan gave me was special. Otousan was the only person I had. The most  
important person in my life. And though he was always so serious, once in awhile,  
his eyes would close and his lips would form a smile and he would always start out  
the same way. "You know, about...." Ahhh! I knew I was in for it.   
  
By the time I entered Kindergarten, Otousan became really sick. I was so worried  
about him. "Don't worry Takashi-kun, it's all right. It's just me getting old...."  
  
Every Sunday, we take trips to the park close to our house. Even though Otousan  
wasn't feeling well, he would always take my hand in his, buy some suama and sit  
on our bench and feed the ducks. He would tell me all kinds of far-fetched stories.  
"No matter what Takashi-kun, we will always come here, ne? It's a nice, peaceful  
place."  
  
Then, one bright sunny day when Otousan and I were watching the ducks, he said  
something to me that I'll never forget. "Remember that I'll always love you,  
Takashi-kun. Don't ever be sad, ne? Because even though you may think that I'm  
not with you, I really am. Always be happy, ne?"  
  
"But Otousan, you'll be better right? I don't want you to go. I don't want you to  
leave me." I started to cry but Otousan... he wiped my tears away....  
  
He was smiling his always happy smile. "Now, now, didn't I tell you not to be sad?  
I'll always be with you even when I'm gone. Just always smile. When I was your  
age, I was always so serious. And I'm glad that you're not that way. You always find  
a way to make me laugh Takashi-kun. You always make me happy. I hate it when  
you look sad. Smile for me always." Otousan took a suama candy from my paper  
bag then and continued to watch the ducks.  
  
When the afternoon sun came, I remembered feeling like my whole world came  
crashing down on me. I found Otousan looking up at the sky with a peaceful smile  
on his face. Even though my father was always so serious, he always had a smile.  
And I knew that he was gone. And I cried. I never cried so hard in my life. And  
unlike the past, my Otousan wasn't there to wipe my tears away.  
  
Even when my Obasan eventually came for me and to comfort me I couldn't stop  
crying. The most important person to me was gone. Otousan was the only one I  
had. But I knew that Otousan was right with what he said. I should be happy. I'll  
smile for him and remember the happy times. I'll remember the stories he told me.  
He'll always be with me.   
  
When I moved in with Obasan to live with her in this little place called Tomoeda, I  
was reluctant. I didn't want to leave my house and my friends and most of all, I  
didn't want to leave the park and my memories of Otousan. I was old enough  
though, to know that he would have wanted it this way...  
  
"Don't worry Takashi-kun," said my Obasan ruffling my hair. The two of us were in  
front of Tomoeda Elementary School, getting ready to step inside the special  
Kindergarten room. "I was told that all the kinds here are very kind. Just like you.  
I'm sure you'll find many new friends. Are you nervous?"  
  
I shook my head. No, I was never nervous. Even back then. I was just afraid that I  
wasn't going to be accepted.  
  
"Class, I have great news!" Announced the Sensei. "We have a new transfer  
student. He's from Hiroshima. Please make him feel welcome... Please come in.  
Come in, Yamazaki-kun."  
  
That was the beginning of my life in Tomoeda. I felt odd not knowing anyone but  
eventually, I got to meet Yanagisawa-san and Sasaki-san and even Kinomoto-san  
too. And most importantly, I got to meet a nice but sometimes serious girl, named  
Mihara-san. My best friend.   
  
"Yamazaki-kun, you should just call me Chiharu-chan like everyone else," she said  
while we were playing together in the sandbox. "We're friends now right? Best  
friends."  
  
"You know Chiharu-chan, a long time ago, sand was made by day old bread."  
  
Chiharu-chan gave me a questioning look. "Eh?"  
  
"Yes, yes... That's why it's named 'sand' because a long time ago people would pick  
the grains of the bread to make sand. It took years and years and years to fill up a  
sandbox."  
  
She sighed. "That's not true Yamazaki-kun. That's a lie."  
  
"It is true." I argued.   
  
Even then, Chiharu-chan was aware of my stories but she never once became angry  
with me about it. Maybe choke me a couple of times but it's all just for fun. I don't  
mind at all.   
  
"Yamazaki-kun, you know, you're always so happy," Chiharu-chan pointed out.  
"Aren't you ever sad? Do you ever miss your Otousan?"  
  
"Of course I miss him. I miss him a lot. He's the only one I had. But he told me that  
it's better to smile and remember instead of being sad forever. Those were his last  
words to me."  
  
"You shouldn't say that your Otousan was the only one you have because you have  
everyone here. You have your Obasan. And there's Naoko-chan tachi... and...  
and..." Chiharu-chan blushed but tried to hide it by looking down at the sandbox.  
"And well, you have me. And we'll always stay together. Best friends. You do want  
to be best friends right?"  
  
I smiled. "Chiharu-chan, of course I want to."  
  
From that day on, I guess I already knew that Chiharu-chan and I will always be  
together. She became the one that's most important to me. And now that I'm older  
and in Jr. High, I know that it will never change. She's the one that always makes  
me happy and sometimes I do make her aggravated but I think it's all right. Well, I  
hope it's all right.  
  
As we were walking home from school, Chiharu-chan slipped her arm through mine.  
"You know, there's that dance on Friday. That fairy-tale dance. I think it'll be fun.  
What do you think?"  
  
"If I am to go with you, then of course, it'll be fun."  
  
Chiharu-chan smiled then. She let go of my arm and stood in front of me. We were  
at the Penguin Park. It seems everytime we walked home together, we always  
ended up there. I like it when Chiharu-chan smiles. She's always so full of life that  
it kills me sometimes. If I see her sad, I would do anything to make her eyes light  
up again. I always want to make her happy.   
  
I tend to make her aggravated sometimes because of my telling of various facts.  
She's always so serious about those things. Like that one time she made that bear  
for me. What was that story Daidouji-san told them? That if you gave a bear to the  
one you love and if the one you love will name that bear after you, you and the one  
you love will be in love forever.  
  
I didn't even realize she gave that bear to me because of that. And there I was,  
making her angry because I named it "Suama" instead. I didn't know. I was  
completely clueless and I felt bad that I didn't see through her clue.   
  
"Don't you want to fall in love with me?" she asked angrily.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me before?" I asked after awhile. I held the bear in my arms.  
"No, I don't want to fall in love with you Chiharu-chan because I am already in love  
with you."  
  
Chiharu-chan blushed. "You really mean that, Yamazaki-kun?"  
  
"Of course. I wouldn't lie about that. I'll name it Chiharu then. That's a nice name.  
My favorite." I turned to Chiharu-chan with a smile. "And you know about love...  
You see, a long time ago.."  
  
"Hai... Hai... it's time to go inside. Let's go..." She said taking my hand, leading me  
back to the classroom.  
  
----------  
  
"Well, it's all set then," she continued. "Rika-chan offered to make the perfect  
costume for us."  
  
"What costumes did she make?" I wondered. "Shrek and Fiona-hime? That would be  
nice. Ogres are like onions you know... and that reminds me, about onions you  
know. A long time ago they we..."  
  
"Yamazaki-kun, it's not going to be Shrek and Fiona-hime."  
  
"Then Superman and Lois Lane? Batman and Robin? Belldandy and Keichii-san? Suoh and Nagisa?"  
  
Chiharu-chan shook her head. "No, no, no. It's supposed to be a FAIRY TALE. A  
character that lived happily every after."  
  
"Superman and Lois lived happily every after."  
  
"But you know what I mean. It has to be a 'fairy tale'"  
  
"Ah! Contraire, Chiharu-chan. You know about, fairy tales..."  
  
"Yamazaki-kun, we'll be Snow White and Prince Charming," said Chiharu-chan,  
cutting me off. "And since... and since..." She began to look sheepish. "And since I  
don't have short black hair like Snow White and all and since you...." Chiharu-chan  
seemed like she was squirming.  
  
"What are you trying to say? You don't mean you want ME to be Snow White do  
you?"  
  
She looked up at me with hopeful eyes. "Well you do have short black hair. And  
well, you did dress up as the evil witch in 5th grade and you were great and  
Rika-chan already made the costumes..."  
  
Now, ever since I was little it was always hard for me to say no. Especially to  
Chiharu-chan. But there always has to be a first time for everything. "Chiharu-chan,  
are you crazy? You have to be Snow White. You can wear a black wig. I don't know.  
But I am not wearing a dress. Why can't you be Snow White?"  
  
"Well because the dress is too big for me."  
  
"Well... Sasaki-san can make it smaller."  
  
"But the dance is only two days away!"  
  
I sighed. I didn't ever want to argue with Chiharu-chan. But me in a dress again?  
With all of the first year students of Tomoeda Jr. High as witnesses along with the  
guys of Student Body?" Iiieee!  
  
Before I can say anything more though, Daidouji-san was there watching us in her  
usual observant manner. She looked like she was in a hurry. Carrying a large gift  
bag with her.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan, what do you think?" Chiharu-chan asked. "Yamazaki-kun, he won't  
dress up as Snow White."  
  
I told Chiharu-chan again that it was ridiculous but Daidouji-san, after awhile,  
suggested we should make a bet for it. Have a race to see who's faster. Have a  
race to see you can eat the most suama or who can eat the most ice cream or  
who'll get the better prize from the UFO machine. "Maybe toss a coin. Then it'll be  
settled easily," she said in that all knowing soft voice of hers.   
  
"Ahhh! That was it! Toss a coin. I had a special coin in my pocket for occasions such  
as these. Daidouji-san excused herself for intruding after that. She said something  
about her bodyguards waiting for her because she might not mail the package in   
time at the postoffice if she walked.   
  
When Daidouji-san said that, Chiharu-chan had this gleam in her eye. "Ahhh! That  
would be so romantic!" She said with a sigh. It was obvious she knew more than me  
about this package and this so called "romantic" thing. Maybe it had something to  
do with those costumes that was inside her bag.  
  
Chiharu-chan crossed her arms at me. "If only you can be that romantic,  
Yamazaki-kun."   
  
I had no idea what she was talking about. Why did this "romantic" thing pop up  
anyway? "What do you mean romantic? How did that pop up all of a sudden?"  
  
Her brows furrowed and she shook her head slowly like she was frustrated. "Ah...  
Nevermind."  
  
I hate it when Chiharu-chan gets like this. I hate it even more when I am the  
reason why she's like this. "Chiharu-chan, let's just toss a coin, OK?" I took the coin  
out of my pocket Hiiragizawa-kun gave me before he left for England.  
  
"You'll need it someday," he said with a smile.  
  
"There's a plus side and a minus side to this coin. If it lands on the plus side, I'll be  
Snow White. If it lands on the minus side you'll be Snow White."  
  
"How do I know it's not a trick?"  
  
"Would I really play tricks here when it concerns me dressing up as a girl?"  
  
Chiharu-chan thought it over and pursed her lips. "All right then, toss it."  
  
I tossed it high in the air, wishing that it would never land. It seemed like an  
eternity when it finally landed near the foot of the Penguin slide. We both ran to it  
and to no surprise to me, it landed on the plus side.   
  
Chiharu-chan cheered. "Oh! Yatttaaa! I won! You're going to be Snow White!"  
  
I tried to defend myself. Telling her that the wind and the sakura were distractions  
to that coin toss and that's why it landed on the plus side. "We should do the toss  
again. It's not fair. The wind got in the way. We have to do it somewhere else."  
  
"No way, Yamazaki-kun. You're Snow White. You'll be the perfect Snow White."  
  
She smiled. An always beautiful Chiharu-chan smile. And that was enough for me.   
"Then you'll be a perfect Prince too. It'll be the first time ever that the Prince will be  
much better looking than the Princess."   
  
Otousan once said that sometimes a smile is enough to make someone happy. That  
sometimes the greatest feeling in the world is for someone to smile at you and just  
be with you.  
  
Dressing up as Snow White wasn't so bad, as I thought it would be. And the dance  
wasn't so bad either. Daidouji-san was there, dressed as 'Clara' from the  
Nutcracker. Yanagisawa-san was dressed as Cinderella and Kinomoto-san was  
dressed as Aurora-hime. She looked quite better in the Aurora-hime costume than  
Li-kun did in our infamous play, Ahh... Li-kun, I miss teasing him. He'll come back  
one day. That's what Chiharu-chan said.  
  
"That's romantic isn't it?" she asked, when we were walking home together from  
the dance. We were waiting for Yanagisawa-san to walk home with us but I think  
that night, it was Tsukada-kun who walked her home instead.  
  
"What's romantic?" I asked. Really, I'm not great with this romantic thing.   
  
"That Li-kun will be back just because of Sakura-chan. It's just like a fairytale."  
  
I agreed. Chiharu-chan is always into "romantic" things. That, and maybe stuffed  
animals... She took my hand and we continued to walk silently home. Her house  
was two more blocks away and mine was just three.   
  
"Chiharu-chan?" I asked without looking at her. I squeezed her hand. Her house  
was only a block away now.  
  
"Nani?" came her soft reply.  
  
"You know about this romantic business..."  
  
"Yamazaki-kun, this isn't another lie is it?" She stopped walking. "You're starting  
with your 'You know abouts...' again and everytime you start out with that line, it's  
always a lie or 'stories' as you call them.  
  
"No, no it's not going to be a lie. I just wanted to tell you that even though I don't  
know much about being anything you call 'romantic'... I just wanted to tell you that  
you are my best friend... And that I... I... love you. And I know saying 'I love you'  
isn't enough because I love you more than all those I love yous... Out of everything  
in this world, I love you the best of all." I let go of her hand, looking down at the  
ground. "Iiee... you see, I can never do this right."  
  
Romance is never my thing. Math? I love math. Facts? My other favorite subject.  
Cooking? I was good at that. But romance? I can't do it. To my surprise though,  
Chiharu-chan hugged me tightly putting her head on my shoulder. "I love you too,  
Yamazaki-kun."  
  
To hear her say that made me so happy. I wouldn't know what I would ever do if  
Chiharu-chan wasn't with me. I think I would be the loneliest person in the whole  
world.  
  
When we finally parted and continued to walk home again, the coin Hiiragizawa-kun  
gave me fell on the sidewalk. I didn't even notice that it had fallen until  
Chiharu-chan picked it up.  
  
"Yamazaki-kun, you dropped your coin."  
  
All I can think then was that out of all the things that had to fall out of my pocket,  
it just had to be that coin. It tried to take it quickly but Chiharu-chan examined it  
and she examined it somemore. She knew...It's because I love you best,  
Chiharu-chan....  
  
"Yamazaki-kun?"  
  
"Huh?" I was discovered.... It's because I always want to make you happy.  
  
"This coin... Both sides are plus signs."  
  
END....  
  
--------------------  
  
So who's next?  
  
What's Chiharu's side of the story?   
And Rika-chan's too.  
What was the package that Tomoyo was carrying?  
What's Eriol's role in all this?   
And Syaoran? where is he?  
And will Meiling-chan come out of animeland and visit the manga world?  
  
  
Til next time. 


	4. Meiling and Her Precious Friend

Disclaimer: CCS Belongs to CLAMP and that is that.  
  
Author's Notes: Well, After a year... of starting this Ichiban series of mine, I am finally able to write the next Chapter. This is Meiling's story... Honestly, I truly love Meiling. I love her attitude and just how outspoken she is at everything. She might have been mean to Sakura, but you can't blame her. Watching that episode when Syaoran told her that he loved another and how she cried on Tomoyo's lap... I was truly touched. When Meiling cried, I felt like crying too... you can tell how hurt she really was. So this is Meiling's chapter in the Ichiban series. I hope she'll be happy too and find the one she loves the most someday.  
  
~ICHIBAN~  
  
Meiling and Her Most Precious Friend  
  
There's nothing like the nights of Hong Kong. The sounds of the city, the city lights that gleam forever until dawn, against a black sky filled with stars. I close my eyes and take in what the night has to offer. Hong Kong is huge. Pretty places, dark alleys, ships by the docks, and a weather that seems to always manage to be more humid every passing day during the summers. I guess it may sound like any other city... but I love it here. It's my home. It's welcoming and familiar... like a big house that will always be there... comforting and secure when you feel unwanted and lost. But somehow- sometimes- the tranquility of all this seems to make you feel lonely too. Why is it like that? It seems like you can never win- No matter what, when the heart knows that you are lonely, it will make you bare the pain of it-- It won't let go until you, yourself let go of that pain.  
  
I guess love will do that to you. It can make you feel anything it wants you to feel or don't want you to feel. It rules humans--- Love. That one word alone can make you feel happy, lonely... it can make you smile and cry and feel all lost.  
  
When I was six years old, my older cousins explained to me about love... and about being in love. They said that I would know when it came to me when I feel all happy inside.   
  
"Or when you have butterflies in you stomach and whenever that person smiles at you, your cheeks get all red..." They giggled, as they turned the stereo on so they can teach me how to dance. It was the first of many things they taught me. Of many things I can do quite well. "I'm glad Auntie got you, Meilin-- we can never do anything with Xiaolang-- he never wants to do anything except practice with that sword of his."  
  
"it's fun teasing him though..." They giggled again. Needless to say, Xiaolang's sisters are the very opposite of him. They were fun and happy. Boy crazy and laughed all the time.  
  
"Now remember Meilin, you can express anything in dancing. Especially when the one you are dancing with also feel the same way you do. And if you find the special person to dance with and you know it's right... your heart will feel it."  
  
  
  
"But how about if you can't find that special person?" I asked.  
  
"Nonesence! Everyone out there will have someone to love one day. That's why love was created... And your heart will know it. Like that story Mother told us a long time ago...  
  
... Once upon a time, there was a Princess who loved a Prince since the day she was born. They met in the forrest many times so they can dance. And everytime the princess listened to his heart, it was always beating fast but with her own heart, it was calm and relaxed. Why, if they loved each other so much did their hearts beat differently? Did one love the other less? ...  
  
I was curious. So which one loved the other less? What was the answer? My cousins did not tell me. They told me it was obvious. But how can that story be obvious? One heart, beat fast-- the other calm. And one loved the other deeply-- while the other did not. It was a simple answer, that I did't know.   
  
When we were little, I would watch Xiaolang all the time. My family's porch overlooked the Li garden and everyday, right when the sun came up, Xiaolang was there. Practicing with his sword or one more martial arts technique that Wei had taught him. I hardly talked to him during those days. My cousin was odd. He was the same age as me but he was always so serious. Can you even see that? A six year old being serious. Xiaolang never smiled, he never laughed, he never even talked to me much except for hurried hellos occasionally. He never played with me, never did anything normal six year olds did. It was that quality of Xiaolang though, that intrigued me. I wanted him to smile, just once, so he can stop being so serious. It was a simple thing. For my cousin to smile at me. Just me. I wanted to see how nice he would look like with a smile. Because of that, I pursuaded my mother to let me train with him. Xiaolang didn't like it at first but I was always persistant. Nothing can get in my way, except for things I had no control over. I wanted to prove so much to Xiaolang how much I wanted to be his friend. I wanted to prove to him that I too, can do something. I may not pocess magic like the rest of the family, but I wanted to show them that I was special too. That I can be great at anything if you just teach me. I think I achieved all that, except of course, to make Xiaolang just smile for me.   
  
It was on that rainy day when I knew that I loved Xiaolang with all my heart. That day he saved the bird his mother had given me. He went out in that rain just to save it. Just for me. For me. Because he didn't want to see me cry. How can I not fall in love with him. Was I too young to even know about love? Yet, I felt it in my heart, that he was my one special person. So, foolish as I was, I made him promise to marry me.  
  
"You don't love anyone else do you?" I had asked with tears in my eyes.  
  
Xiaolang-- he just sat in front of me with confusion and embarassment. His face red. "So if you don't love anyone else Xiaolang, then I'll be your fiance. I love you the most in this world. But if the time comes that you'll find someone else to love then our engagement is off. But until then, I'll be your fiance. Do you promise? Do you promise?"  
  
My cousin sighed, looking away from me. "Do whatever you want..."  
  
I never felt so happy-- I know Xiaolang only said that because I was stubborn but he accepted it anyway. And he kept that promise. I loved him for that. I loved him because he was so special. When he went to Japan to get those Clow Cards, I came with him. I wanted to help him. All I wanted was to help him-- but it seemed all I did was annoy him. All I wanted was one thing-- really Xiaolang-- it was just a simple thing.   
  
Then-- there was Kinomoto-san. Our rival who didn't even treat us as one. The girl that was always happy and smiled a lot but didn't even notice the signs that were appearant when Xiaolang was looking at her. He didn't even know it until later on either-- I think deep in my heart I knew. Even then-- I knew it. I just couldn't face it. No-- it can't be.  
  
"That promise we made. You said that if I found someone, that I love the most..." He started out slowly.  
  
We were outside the porch of the apartment he and I shared. Tomoeda, Japan-- it wasn't at all like Hong Kong. It was too quiet. There were no traffic noises or lights that gleamed underneath the black sky-- it was peaceful-- but I wanted the noise then. I did not want to hear Xiaolang. It was over. His sisters never told me about the pain that comes with love. They never told me how much it hurts.  
  
"So you found someone that you love the most then?" I asked.  
  
"Yes.."  
  
"Kino... moto... -san?"  
  
"H-- How did you know?"  
  
Hopeless Xiaolang. Of course I would know. You said her first name, You allowed her to call you by your first name, with even just a mention of her name your face turns red and you look at her like she's your whole world. Did you think I wouldn't notice that? Hopeless Xiaolang-- why did it turn out this way? Did you know how much I cried on Daidouji-san's lap that night? She let me cry all night without saying a word. I had to let it all out for you. For you Xiaolang-- I loved you so much. I loved everything about you. I loved you more than anyone in this world. I love how gullible you are, just like Kinomoto-san. How you try to act so serious but there you are competing with Kinomoto-san for Tsukishiro-san's attention. I love how you always have to protect everyone. Hopeless Xiaolang-- Did you even care for me at all? Did you love me even one bit? It hurts so much... the feeling of a broken heart. Everytime I think of the memories when it was just you and me-- I start to cry because now I think that those memories are wasted because you love someone else. I thought that way for a very long time. I mean, did you even remember them? I was so hurt... but I can't get mad at you. I know I was selfish and foolish for thinking such things. All I wanted was for you to smile for me. Just for me. Not like those ordinary smiles you give but something that I can memorize. To let me know that you accept me as an equal and a friend.  
  
A phone call rang through the night while I was still outside, swimming with the noices of the city. I picked it up before the machine did. It was rather late. No one really calls me during the night. "Hello, Li here..."  
  
"Ah, Meiling-chan! I thought no one was home." It was Daidouji-san.  
  
"It's been awhile, Daidouji-san. How are you doing?"  
  
"I'm fine and you?"  
  
"It's getting hot. But I'm fine. School just started."  
  
We talked for what seemed like forever-- the usual conversation of friends who have not seen or spoken to each other in awhile. We talked about Xiaolang and Kinomoto-san, this and that, and then... she told me about a dance...  
  
"The theme will be 'Fairy Tales'," she explained. "You have to dress up as someone who lived happily ever after." She paused for a moment. "Meiling-chan... I've sent a package for you to give to Li-kun. I need your help..."  
  
At that time, for the past few days, Xiaolang was in a quiet state. He often just sat there in the garden looking off into the distance. "Hey, Xiaolang! Stop sitting there and give me a hand with this package." The box was heavy. Daidouji-san sure knows how to solve every situation. But I'm glad, she asked me for help. I would do anything to make him stop looking stupid and sad like he was.   
  
"Meilin!" He gotup from the bench he was sitting on to help me with the box. "Why are you bringing something like this out here? Mother's in the kitchen."   
  
"It's not for her. It's for you."  
  
He looked surprised and almost dropped the package. "No, it can't be.." he mumbled, staring at the box.   
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"Damn that Daidouji. All I said was, 'I wish I can go but..' She didn't even let me finish my sentence and then... It can't be..."  
  
"Well, go ahead and open it." I said. "I want to see what it is."  
  
He opened the large heavy box carefully. There, wrapped securely, was a beautifully made Prince Charming costume, with everything included. The feathered hat, the shoes, the cape... and a small note as well, written carefully in Daidouji-san's neat handwriting. He sighed a frustrated sigh. Though a small smile appeared on his face that had been missing for days. "Daidouji is an idiot."  
  
"She called me, you know. Why didn't you tell me? It's romantic, isn't it? Kinomoto-san will be very surprised." I kneeled down in from of him. "So stop moping around. I never thought you the type to be love sick like this."  
  
"I am NOT love sick," Xiaolang stated. His usual glare thrown at me. Except this time, it softened up. "It's just that... I miss her that's all. Training's been hard, school's been frustrating, and Mother keeps pressuring me about things. When I talked to her on the phone the other night, She sounded like she was about to cry. I.. I hate it when anyone cries. Especially her."  
  
"Hopeless Xiaolang. Then what's stopping you? Nothing ever stopped you before." I handed him an envelope with a plane ticket inside. "This is for you. Just looking at your sad face makes me depressed. And I can't be depressed. Depression will deminish my beauty, you know."  
  
He took the ticket in his hands. "Meilin..." he said, in that usual way of his, whenever he says my name. "Than..."  
  
I put my hand up. "No need to thank me. I just want you to be happy that's all. So just go to Japan already, and make Kinomoto-san happy. I talked to Auntie. She said it was OK." I walked away. Now those two can be happy again. Daidouji-san and I have done our job. I couldn't help but think then, about when it will be my turn as well. Will I find someone to dance with someday? And how will our hearts beat? Will it be fast like the prince? Or calm like the princess? I wonder if I'll ever know the answer.  
  
"Meilin!" Xiaolang was at my porch the next day, breathing hard. He yelled my name once more with determination in his eyes.  
  
  
  
"What is it? Why are you standing there looking like that?"  
  
"Meilin! I want you... I want you to..." My hopeless cousin. You almost have to laugh when he's this frustrated and when his face is all red. "Meilin, I want you to teach me how to dance!"  
  
Because he was so embarassed and frustrated, Xiaolang accidentally said it too loud that his sisters who were sunbathing on one of the garden terraces, squealed with delight.   
  
"Why does our cute little brother want to know how to dance?"  
  
  
  
"He wants to dance with his little Cherry Blossom"  
  
"Ah! I can just see it! Our cute little brother... dancing with his cute little girlfriend!"  
  
"Cute! Cute! Cute!"  
  
Xiaolang's face got redder and redder everytime his sisters made a comment. "ENOUGH!" He yelled at them. He looked like he was about to say something more... but closed his mouth instead and turned to me. "Meilin," he said, calmly. "Please teach me how to dance."  
  
I had to smile at this. Xiaolang looked desperate and determined at the same time. It was the first time he had asked for my help for anything. I felt very happy.  
  
We practiced in the Li training room. A room that always made me uncomfortable when I was little. It was bare, with wooden walls and wooden floors and a few floor mats. It was scary in there really. It was quiet and it was located in the far corner of Auntie's place. Far enough so no one can disturb you.  
  
"Well, where should we start?" I turned the CD player on. Slow, ballroom music filled the empty room. "The first thing you have to do, is know how to hold your partner."  
  
With the mention of that, Xiaolang immediately turned red but nodded. "All right"  
  
"So... come and hold me." He turned even redder, but did what I told him. "Wrap your arm around my waist like this and hold my other hand like this." He was nervous. I could feel his whole body shaking. "You're heart's beating really fast," I said, resting my head on his chest for a few seconds. "You don't have to be so nervous. It's only me you know."  
  
"I can't help it all right? This whole thing is making me uncomfortable and crazy."  
  
"Just calm down and you'll be fine."  
  
"I keep stepping on your feet."  
  
"It's all right. It doesn't hurt. Just like this. It's simple really. You have to lead me. So you step forward and I step back, like this. Then we count. One, two, three, four... One, two, three, four.." It took my cousin a few times and though he was awkward, he was dancing. I don't think he ever did get calm holding me. He was nervous and his face was forever crimson. "Now it's time for the slow dance..."  
  
Xiaolang quickly jumped aback with total horror. "EHHH?"  
  
"Slow dance. Slow dance! Dear cousin. It's nothing new and it's necessary for you to dance it."  
  
"You're torturing me aren't you?"  
  
"Xiaolang-- just dance with me will you? You don't have to dance with me anymore after this. You said you wanted me to teach you didn't you?"  
  
And so, as I was dancing with my nervous cousin.. that story his sisters told me when I was little, came back to me....  
  
.... Once upon a time there lived a Prince and a Princess who loved to dance... but when they listened to each others hearts... one was calm and the other fast ...  
  
It was a story I did not know the answer to. But now I realized that it really was an obvious answer. I love you Xiaolang. I love you forever.  
  
"I think you've done well enough. With that Kinomoto-san, if she starts crying because you aren't there... well, I can't even see that. So put a smile to her face."  
  
He gave a small distant smile. "Ah... I can't wait to see her."  
  
I turned the CD player off. "This room still scares me a little. It's so empty and unfeeling. When you and I trained here-- I always wondered how you can be OK in this room. I live for noise, I guess."  
  
"I got used to it. No one really talked to me then. Or bothered me. Like you did. So before you, I didn't really care."  
  
"I bothered you?" I sighed, smiling at him. "Ah... that's me. But you're happy that I bothered you right? Admit it."  
  
Another small smile appeared on his face before I left the empty room.  
  
"Meilin..." He called to me.  
  
"Hm?"  
  
"Thank you"  
  
More than a year has past since that day and everything is different now. Different because when Xiaolang came back, there was a happy gleam in his eyes. A determination of some kind. Different because I too changed. I realized that I just need to let go. Let go of everything I have kept all hidden in my heart.  
  
Xiaolang was leaving for good in two days. He was leaving because of Kinomoto-san. Because he told her that he would be back. And because she told him that no matter how long it takes, she'll wait for him as well. Even though there's a missing piece of my heart now-- I'm happy because for once in his life, finally... I know he's happy.  
  
I gave up now. I gave up a long time ago. But I'll always love him. How can I not? he was always there for me, even when I bothered him and annoyed him... still Xiaolang didn't say anything to make me hate him. I love him because of so many things. But I love him most of all because of his kindess. He hides that kindess well, with those glares of his, but I know him well enough. I love him because even if it was a silly childhood promise, he still kept it. I always wondered why. He didn't have to. I was just being me. Did you love me Xiaolang?  
  
... I love you! I love you the most in this world. I want to be your fiance. You don't have anyone else you love do you? But if you do find someone else, then I don't have to be your fiance anymore. But until then, I'll be your fiance. I love you the most. Promise me ....  
  
  
  
I was so foolish. I was so stubborn. Even then, I was outspoken. I was never one to hide my feelings. I did so many awful things to Kinomoto-san especially, because I knew that someday... Someday-- it will turn out this way. But I never hated Kinomoto-san. She was so nice and so kind, even when I was so mean. I love Kinomoto-san too. I hope she takes care of my cousin. I hope they'll be happy.  
  
"Well, this is it. Isn't it? I'll miss you Xiaolang. You better visit often or else I'll come over there to drag you back here. Call me when you get there." I was the last in line. The last one of the family to say goodbye to him. Auntie and the rest were already waiting for me off to the side of the airport. "I'll miss you, you know. The Li place will never be the same without you. I'm already missing you now and you didn't even leave yet." I took his hand. He still had yet to say something but it was OK. That was Xiaolang after all. He didn't really need to say anything to me. "I'll miss you.." I said again.. letting go off his hand and heading to where our family stood... But Xiaolang-- he grabbed my arm and pulled me to him. He embraced me so tightly, I almost lost my breath.  
  
"Stupid. Why are you walking away when I didn't even say anything to you yet..."  
  
I was lost for words. His grip loosened up a little but he didn't let go of me. I found myself wrapping my arms around him too.  
  
"Meilin, I'll miss you. Thank-you..." He whisphered in my ear.  
  
"Thank you? Thank you for what?"  
  
"For caring for me. For being my friend. I know I never showed it but I thank you for being my best friend. I know you may not think it but you do have a special place in my heart. I love you Meilin. I love you very much. Thank you for always caring for me."  
  
"Xiaolang..." I sighed softly and closed my eyes, my head on his shoulder. He was still holding me tightly. I could smell his scent. I could hear his heart. It was so calm and beating steadly. I could feel his warm breath on my neck. I always wanted Xiaolang to hold me like this. Closely and tightly like this. To tell me he loved me like he had done. But it's different now. I'm so happy that he thinks of me as his best friend. I was so happy that he told me he loved me. Hopeless Xiaolang-- this is why I love you very much.  
  
He let go of me and again he said, "I'll miss you Meilin..."  
  
I nodded. "Now you can go and live happy ever after. Your fairytale is finally starting."  
  
"Couldn't you think of anything else to say other than that corny line?" He smiled at me. A really bright smile. A smile that was only for me. Ah, Xiaolang, you really do look nice with a smile. You should do it more often. "Meilin... I'll pray for you as well. Like you did for me a long time ago. Under the skies of Tomoeda. I want you to find your happiness too." And with that, with one last big smile-- Xiaolang waved goodbye and headed towards the departing gates. I wonder when I'll see him again. I hope it won't be too long.   
  
... Love ... is difficult. It hurts, it pains, it breaks your heart. But it also brings happiness if you let it. I don't love Xiaolang anymore as someone that could eventually be my prince. But I love him even more as a friend. A best and precious friend. And though he didn't realize it, he gave me what I always wanted. A smile. A smile from him to tell me that I was his friend. I'm perfectly happy with that.   
  
For my cousin who was always so serious, who once never smiled and never laughed... I wish you all the happiness in the world with Kinomoto-san. I wish that someday I can have a happy ending too.  
  
You know... there really is nothing like the nights of Hong Kong. It always welcomes me. When I had a broken heart and whenever I was happy-- the stars spanning that black sky always gave me hope. It showed... -forever-.... Forever. I want to be happy too. -Forever- I want to dance in a fairytale dance with my prince whose heart will be calm just like mine because he's dancing with me and only me. -Forever- And I know in my heart that my forever will come one day. And I'll say, the skies of Hong Kong showed me that. Yes, I want to find happiness too. -Someday... Forever...- 


	5. Tomoyo and the Beautiful Blue Sky

Author's Notes: This is the fifth chapter of the Ichiban series. Tomoyo's chapter that will leave some things unanswered that will be answered on the next chapter. This is maybe just an introduction. Tomoyo is a character that everyone is intrigued by I guess. She is open, yet obscure at the same time. I hope this small but "long" intro will be all right. Like Meiling, I think Tomoyo has a lot of feelings that has yet to be discovered. I hope you enjoy. Whomever is reading this.  
  
--------------  
  
Tomoyo and the Beautiful Blue Sky  
  
ICHIBAN  
  
If anyone ever told me that I would end up here, at this very moment, at this very place, I would never have believed it. When I was a child I only had specific dreams. Dreams that I listed in an order that I knew I could achieve. I even stored it in my jewelry box, kept it locked with everything that was important to me. My diary, old concert tickets from when Grandfather and I went to see the Nutcracker back in sixth grade, and the eraser that Sakura-chan gave me long ago. That was my most treasured thing. I never used it and hardly ever picked it up to hold it. It's pink color was still so vibrant that the company's name written in black on top of the eraser was still clear. These were my treasures. I never could let them go. But that's one thing about some treasures. If you kept it locked up like that, it would never be able to show its true beauty. I don't really know how to describe it but I knew that keeping things locked up, keeping my list of dreams hidden was too much for me. I achieved almost all of them. Except for one. One dream that would never come true. It was a dream I had since I met Sakura-chan on that first day of school in the fourth grade. Ah, but those are just memories now. I lived in memories for too long. And it isn't right for me to do that. For I have a new list now and I want the last one of my dreams to come true. I am determined for that.  
  
Looking up at the sky from my view, I just came to realize how blue it really is. What a perfect and beautiful day. It was so blue that it was like the color of the Pacific Ocean. Like the exact same colors of the sky during those times when Mother and I used to go to the onsen in Hokkaido. Whenever we were there I would escape from my body guards that always kept an eye on me and Mother's watchful eyes. My mother was very protective of me. Though she was always kept busy with the everyday business of the toy company, those little vacations we took were always her small highlights. Whenever she got a chance, she would buy me a new dress or would help me with a new hairstyle, she would say that I was as beautiful as her Nadeshiko, that I should never cut my hair so it'll look like Nadeshiko's. Her eyes turned to happiness everytime she said Sakura-chan's mother's name. I learned to live with it because I knew it made my mother happy. Amazing how just the color of the sky can make you remember such things.  
  
I wonder if Sakura-chan is looking at the same blue sky at this very moment. I can see her smiling face, her always gleaming green eyes. Just thinking about it made my heartache just a little bit. Not because it's broken or anything of that sort but because I already knew and accepted that I would not be able to see that everyday. Her happy face, that beautiful smile and her never ending happy aura. To see that was life for me back then.  
  
It's different now though. That part of me is over. That dream, that yearning, that longing, that small piece of happiness. My heart beat for something else entirely. I looked at my list of dreams, smiling, taking a deep breath. "This is it Tomoyo, ready or not." I repeated that to myself. This was my next step. I was ready.  
  
-----------------  
  
"I have a friend." Hiiragizawa-kun laid his hand on my shoulder, looking at me with his always kind eyes. He shocked me a little. I wasn't expecting someone to approach me or even notice me at the cafe. He sat down on the chair across from me and without asking, took a sip of my tea, taking a cookie. "Sorry. I hope you don't mind," he said with a smile, placing the teacup back on its saucer.  
  
I returned his smile. "How can I mind if you drank out of it before I even had a chance to drink it or say no. How was it? Good? Bitter?"  
  
"It's very good Daidouji-san. What is it? Rasberry and Peach Tea?" He asked, flashing another smile. "Anyway," he continued, not waiting for my answer. "You would have really said no? To me? I'm sorry. I'll buy you another cup."  
  
I giggled. "How can you be so polite, yet be so..." I couldn't find the words. Silly? Crazy? But those were the words that you wouldn't find me uttering in front of Hiiragizawa-kun. "Hiiragizawa-kun, I would think by now that you would know when I'm kidding and when I'm not. Of course I don't mind. Not at all. And you're right. It is Rasberry and Peach tea."  
  
"What an interesting combination," he observed.  
  
"It is," I said. "You can have any combination of tea you want in this place. That's why I took a liking to it. You can order green tea with mint tea if you want."  
  
"Or maybe lemon tea with old english tea?" He asked slyly. "Or how about white tea with oolong tea?"  
  
I laughed and shook my head. "You're so... you're so..."  
  
He took his glasses off and leaned over the table waiting for me to finish my sentence. "What am I Daidouji-san?"  
  
I wiped the corners of my mouth with a napkin. "Ah, nevermind." I said. I closed the book I was reading. He was still leaning over the table but he put his glasses back on. "You didn't finish your sentence, you know."  
  
"You didn't either," he said.  
  
I sighed. "Really, Hiiragizawa-kun. What is it? Why are you here? What's this about your friend?"  
  
"All right," he said, leaning back on the chair. He didn't speak for awhile but just kept his eyes on me. He adjusted his glasses then leaned in again, giving me another of his many many smiles. "I have this friend who wants to meet you." He said this slowly, as if he would hurt me if he said it any other way.  
  
My heart started to beat faster when he uttered that last sentence. Back then I couldn't explain as to why I started to get nervous. I wanted to disappear. But maybe I was contradicting myself. Maybe I knew. I just didn't want to face it. There was probably a sign of shock in my face for Hiiragizawa-kun apologized and looked away from me, letting himself look around other tables of the outdoor cafe. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean for you to feel awkward or surprised. I just thought that... it wouldn't be so bad if you two meet. I thought you wouldn't mind."  
  
"I have finals to study for," I said quickly. What was he thinking anyway? This friend? "I don't really want to meet anyone." I opened up my book again reading the same sentences over and over. Hiiragizawa-kun sat there watching me. Why now? Why did he have to find me and tell me this? I wanted to be alone. I sat there feeling uncomfortable, my heart beating faster. My hands shaking to even lift up my tea cup that I didn't bother to even drink anymore in fear that he might see how nervous I had become. How did he find me? I asked myself. The cafe was located on the other side of town of where his house was. It was secluded, hidden by trees. "Really, if you don't mind Hiiragizawa-kun, I would like to be alone so I can study."  
  
"It's such a nice day out," he said. "Finals aren't for another month right?"  
  
"It's always good to prepare." I heard him sigh. He stood up, pushing the chair in. "It's such a beautiful day. Smell the fresh air, look at the blue sky. Daidouji-san, you probably won't believe me if I tell you this but I understand you. You and I..." He paused, his eyes searching mine, I had to look away. "You and I..." he continued again. "You and I are the same in many ways. A long time ago I thought only seeing the one that was important to me... I thought just watching them smile was enough happiness for me to live on. But Daidouji-san, that's not true is it? Just watching isn't enough is it? Maybe it's being selfish, maybe it's another reason but it's not enough just to see them happy. Those reasons are selfish too, Daidouji-san. Do you realize that? Because it's running away too isn't it? Daidouji-san, are you really happy this way? Do you really see the blue sky today? Do you smell the fresh air? Do you really hear the birds chirping on that tree? Do you see the flowers that are blooming in those trees?"  
  
"I'm not blind or deaf, Hiiragizawa-kun. Of course I see and hear those things. Of course I smell the fresh air. I did not lose my sense of smell. I did not lose my sense of sight and hearing."  
  
Hiiragizawa-kun smiled. "Are you sure?" He asked almost in a whisper, looking up at the sky. "Are you sure Daidouji-san?" He stood beside me. He did not look at me anymore. He just kept looking up at the sky. The birds flying up high, the flowers on the trees, the flowers planted around the trees. "My friend... I told her that maybe you'll meet her at the park. You know, the one where the ducks are."  
  
I looked up at him closing my book, finding that smile that he always gave me on his face. He didn't say another word to me. He stuffed his hand inside his dress pants pocket, walking away looking up at the sky.  
  
I didn't understand what went on between us. Why did he choose that day to tell me what I didn't want to hear? Why did he come find me to tell me that he understood me? How can he possibly understand me, how I was feeling, when he hardly knew me? If it weren't for Sakura-chan we would never have met.... But when I think about it... if it weren't for Sakura- chan, I would not be here right now. Being friends with him, listening to him... if it wasn't for her... for him... I wouldn't have been able to realize.  
  
I tell myself all the time that I am much stronger than how I really feel inside. I don't consider myself the same as those characters I read about in the many manga that I borrow from Naoko-chan. I can't even see myself in their shoes. I see those girls as weak because unlike them, I was not a lonely person. Happiness was always inside me. Always always always. I had Grandfather, Mother, and my other friends. If I were lonely why then do I smile whenever I see her happy face? Why do I laugh whenever I am with her? Hiiragizawa-kun did not understand me. But I couldn't help but think that maybe I am too easy to read.  
  
"Do you really see the blue sky today? Do you smell the fresh air?" Those were the words of Hiiragizawa-kun. Such easy questions. Of course I do. Am I such an open window? Since that day in fifth grade when I stopped them from fighting... I knew. It was going to happen no matter what. I knew. Sakura-chan's brother knew. Everyone knew. Her happiness was my happiness. I always believed that. I did everything to help. I did everything to see that smile on her face.  
  
--------------------  
  
"I think you're going to look so beautiful," I told Sakura-chan. "Li- kun would like you to go."  
  
Sakura-chan looked at the mirror holding the blue princess dress against her body. She was smiling her old smile but everything about her whole demeanor and her downcast eyes did not match that smile. "It's beautiful, Tomoyo-chan," she said. I told her that I was so happy making it. It's been two years since the last time I made her a costume. Now that we were finally in Jr. High I finally had the opportunity again to make her one for the Fairytale Dance. I think my eyes started to gleam. The fan girl in me wanted so much for her to be happy. I knew for a fact that she was going to be beautiful. Still, Sakura-chan hesitated trying to hide behind that smile.  
  
"Thank-you Tomoyo-chan. It's beautiful. But... but I'm not sure I want to go." She said the words I knew she was going to say.  
  
"But Sakura-chan, you have to go. None of us have been to a dance before and you look so kawaii and Li-kun said that he always wants you to be happy. And I guarantee that you will be happy if you come. I'm almost positive about it. And Naoko-chan and Chiharu-chan will be disappointed if you don't come." I said this very quickly because it pained me. I was almost thirteen and nothing I said was making me feel better. I felt so selfish because I should be happy. After all, I was the one who planned all this. I was the one that had called Meiling-chan for help. I hated myself for what my heart was feeling. I smiled at her hoping she would agree. And when she said 'Yes' in her quiet way I was relieved. It was going to happen after all. She was going to be happy.  
  
"What is your costume Tomoyo-chan?" Sakura-chan asked, looking at me curiously.  
  
"Clara," I answered.  
  
"Clara?" Sakura-chan put her princess dress down on the bed. "From the Nutcracker?"  
  
I nodded. "Grandfather and I saw it for Christmas last year. I thought it was a beautiful story." I clasped my hands together. "Clara. The toy soldier. I think it's my favorite ballet so far."  
  
"I can't wait to see you in your costume too, Tomoyo-chan."  
  
Sakura-chan didn't know that I was busy making a costume for Li-kun. It took all my nights making it, locked in my room right after I school. When Meiling-chan called me that Li-kun had already recieved the costume I made for him and that he was all set and ready to go to Japan, the two of us were excited as ever. "It's funny isn't it?" Meiling-chan said over the phone. "That we're doing all this when we're the ones..." Meiling-chan did not finish but she didn't need to finish for I already knew what she was going to say. We understood each other when it comes to our feelings about Li-kun and Sakura-chan. We both knew the pain, the loneliness, the hopelessness and those other feelings. Still, I was excited. I even told Sakura-chan that I wished I still had my video camera so I can capture everything. As expected, Sakura-chan blushed with embarassment.  
  
I think that was the beginning of my letting go. That night of the fairy tale dance.  
  
Sakura-chan seemed more alive after that night. Meiling-chan called to tell me that Li-kun too was happy when she picked him up at the airport. Two years later, before the start of our last year of Jr. High, it was my turn to pick Li-kun up at the airport. He called to tell me he was finally able to stay. "I'm gonna be home," he said. "I can't wait." To think that Li-kun considered Tomoeda home was sweet in a way. If Sakura-chan had heard him I think her heart would have skipped a beat. I told him this over the phone and I heard him squirm uncomfortably on the other end. I giggled at the tought of him blushing while talking to me. "Really Daidouji," he coughed. "You think about really stupid things."  
  
Li-kun met me outside of the airport. He recognized me first, tapping me on the shoulder because I was looking the other way for him. I jumped in surprise. "I didn't mean to scare you," he said rather quickly. His face getting a bit red. "To be honest, I didn't know where you were but then I realized no one else but you, Daidouji, would have a white limo, a bouquet of flowers and three female bodyguards outside of this airport and I guess I was right." He smiled and without any hesitation or without waiting for my reply, he hugged me. I had not seen Li-kun since the day he left for Hong Kong four years ago. I've spoken with him on the phone a couple times especially when Meiling-chan and I "helped" him visit Sakura-chan for that fairy tale dance. That was all. Sakura-chan keeps a picture of him on her desk but sometimes a person on a picture isn't the same as when you see them right before your eyes. And Li-kun was there... tall now with hair still styled in that messy way, wearing a black suit. He hugged me so tightly that the bouquet of flowers I was going to give him fell to his feet. His actions were so far away from the Li-kun I knew four years ago that it really did surprise me. Li-kun let go of me, picking up the flowers. "I guess these are for me?"  
  
I nodded. "Welcome back," I said bowing to him. "Welcome home." He smiled at those words. I have never seen Li-kun smile before then. It amazed me. He changed so much. From that shy frowning boy to someone that was not even afraid to hug me. I told him this and a part of the old Li-kun came back when a slight blush appeared on his cheeks.  
  
He rubbed his neck awkwardly, looking up at the sky. "Same old Daidouji. You never fail to make those kinds of embarassing observations."  
  
"Making you and Sakura-chan blush Li-kun, was always the highlight of my days back then. Didn't you know that?" I had to giggle. I couldn't help it.  
  
"Except of course you had that video camera of yours too." He looked at both my hands. "Funny, where is that camera now?"  
  
"Really, why would I have it? Sakura-chan's not even around."  
  
Li-kun laughed. "That's right," he bowed to me. "I forgot."  
"Sakura-chan will be so surprised." I said after awhile. "She doesn't expect a thing."  
  
"I hope everything will turn out all right," he said looking up at the sky again. "I've been so worried."  
  
"Don't be. I can't wait to see her face when she sees you."  
  
"Me too." He said. "It's been so long, since that dance." He looked back at me, with another blush on his face. "I'm such an idiot. If my sisters see me this way, I'll never hear the end of it." He shook his head. "Anyway, Daidouji, I want to say that you look great. You look very beautiful..."  
  
Li-kun's words were so quick that it took me awhile to register them. Did he really say that? We were inside the limo driving away from Narita, Li-kun looking so happy. He will probably not remember that very moment his face shone like it did when we drove through Tokyo but I will. It was another sort of happiness that I wanted to remember. "Thank-you, by the way," I started talking before I was able to stop myself. "For saying that. No one has ever said that to me before... without comparing me to someone else."  
  
He turned away from the limo's window to look at me sitting on the opposite side of him. "What did I say?" He asked with wonder in his eyes.  
  
I shook my head. "Ah, it's nothing. It's not important." I looked out my window. It was better that he did not remember. It was OK.  
  
But he did not take his eyes off me. I can tell he was trying to recall what he said minutes before... "Ah," he said after a long pause. He looked out the window from his side again. "It's the truth Daidouji. You are."  
  
From that day on, my whole ninth grade year seemed like a blur. It seemed everything in my life that felt alive were spinning above me and I couldn't catch up and all I was left with was silence. Like that lone wind you hear in the mountains or a lone rooster call in the early morning. The noisy cicadas in the trees and the cherry blossoms that follow the way of the breezes. It's that silence I did not want.  
  
I was spending less time with Sakura-chan, less time with Chiharu- chan and Naoko-chan... I felt like I did not belong anywhere and that is what I didn't understand. Why did I feel this way when everyone was happy all around me? I kept believing that I was happy. My best friend was finally able to smile the way she used to. There was a spark in her, this brightness in her eyes. When I was younger even just a small splash of her spirit was enough to make me love her more than anyone else. I loved her with all my heart. Her happiness was my happiness, I believed in that thinking for so long. But everything was different... it wasn't the same anymore. I couldn't endure it anymore.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan?" I was in the hallway walking towards the music room when I heard Sakura-chan's voice.  
  
I turned around, waiting for her to catch up. "Sakura-chan?" Other kids were running past me so they can finally head home or go somewhere else other than school. Voices were everywhere, small conversations flying in the halls but Sakura-chan's voice was the only one I heard. The only one I was able to hold on to.  
  
Her face was flushed when she finally caught up with me. "Why did you walk away so quickly? I was just putting my books away and when I turned around you were gone." Sakura-chan laid her hand on my shoulder.  
  
I turned away from her worried, questioning eyes. "I'm sorry," I said. "I just wanted to practice in the music room."  
  
Sakura-chan followed me to the music room which, except for us, was empty. I sat down on the piano, spreading out my music sheets. I began to play scales just to practice but mostly it was to avoid looking at her. "Tomoyo-chan..." Sakura-chan began. Her voice sounded nervous, unsure of what to say next. "Is something wrong?"  
  
"Of course there's nothing wrong," I said immediately. I smiled, turning back to the piano. That really was the truth for the most part. There really was nothing wrong, at least nothing that she could have done for me.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan," Sakura-chan walked towards me. Her usual nervous stance was present in the air. I was used to her aura, I knew every one of her actions by heart. Nervousness meant she wanted to say something but didn't want to hurt me. "I... I can't wait to hear you sing. Can you let me listen to you for awhile?"  
  
When we were younger, Sakura-chan used to listen to me sing. She would close her eyes as she sat on a desk in front of the piano, listening as if the music was part of her very air. She looked so pretty when she did that. I felt so happy because she was there for me. Listening to me. Don't you see? She was my world. But all that had to change. I couldn't do it anymore. Pretending was never my specialty.  
  
"I'm going away," I said, closing the piano, gathering my music sheets. Why did I even bother to spread them out? Even when I wanted to stop pretending, I still didn't want to let go. "I'm going to London. I applied to a music academy there and I got accepted."  
  
Sakura-chan's eyes widened. "What? What to you mean? When did you decide this? Why didn't you tell me?" Her voice cracked then drifted away.  
  
"I have to leave on Sunday," I continued.  
  
"You're going to leave just like that? You're going to leave before graduation? But why? But..." Sakura-chan shook her head, tears starting to form around her eyes. With a quickness that I was not prepared for, she came up to throw her arms around my neck. She buried her face on my chest. "No, what are you saying? I just don't understand." Her words were muffled, her face wet.  
  
I stayed quiet, my arms stuck to my sides. I had let her cry. I tried not to comfort her, to put my arms around her. I couldn't do it anymore. I had to let go and if I were to say anything, I knew I would not be able to handle it. I would not be able to leave quietly, I just wanted to slip away. Just looking at her crying face then, the words she had said to me. "What would I do without you, Tomoyo-chan?" I didn't know what to say, for I didn't know what I would do without her either.  
  
That night, I began to pack. I wanted to leave as soon as possible. My mother asked if I can hold off on it. "What are you going to do there for 2 months? Why don't you wait until graduation? The next semester is so far away..." But I couldn't make myself stay in Tomoeda another minute. It hurt too much to even think about it. I opened the jewelry box with all my treasured possessions and took the eraser that Sakura-chan gave me along with the dream list that I had written, putting it inside my carry on bag. I was determined even then to achieve all of that. The last one wasn't going to come true but I was over it.  
  
Sakura-chan, Li-kun, and everyone else bid me goodbye in the airport that Sunday. They wanted to throw a party for me but I did not want it. I wanted to not think about Tomoeda when I went on that plane. It was like I wanted a new clean slate. I didn't want that bagagge and I did not want to cry anymore.  
  
"We'll write all the time," said Sakura-chan. "I'll miss you so much. It won't be the same without you." Sakura-chan hugged me so hard I almost lost my breath. I felt her tears on my cheek. She wished me luck. I wished her to be happy. "Tomoyo-chan..." she said in a soft whisper.  
  
"What is it?" I asked.  
  
Sakura-chan wiped her tears away, giving me a braver look on her face. Maybe a look of soemthing else as well. I had to look away. But she had taken my face between her hands and kissed me on the cheek. "I love you, Tomoyo-chan."  
  
Li-kun had also bid me goodbye. "Daidouji," he had said. "I know why you're doing this. Sakura... she tried to tell me. I don't know what to say. You must hate me, like her brother. You feel the same way I do about Sakura. You and I love her more than..." Li-kun sighed. "You must hate me..."  
  
I never hated Li-kun. I never regreted the fact that Li-kun and Sakura-chan had fallen in love. It was their 'destiny' as they say in those romance books and I was not part of that destiny. I was probably the happiest than anyone in the world to see them happy. I told myself that but I just couldn't help feeling hurt. I couldn't help but feel something missing inside me and I just didn't want to feel that anymore.  
  
"Take care of Sakura-chan, Li-kun. You better not make her cry or else I'm going to come back and hurt you."  
  
Li-kun laughed softly. "Funny... Meilin almost said the same thing to me when I left Hong Kong."  
  
"I guess she and I are alike in our thinking." Funny. Meiling-chan and I were very much alike aren't we? I wonder if Meiling-chan too felt that something missing in her heart as well. Then again, I think everyone had felt that something missing in their hearts once before. Or at least will feel it one day. That hurt that makes you want to take your heart out and throw it away.  
  
Li-kun hugged me then, "Thank-you, Daidouji..."  
  
It was a simple thing, those two very simple words. Yet, those words alone meant a lot of things. Li-kun didn't even have to say anything more. I knew the meaning behind it all. When I arrived in London, I would always think about it. Sometimes it made me happy, sometimes it made me sad. Everything that has happened in my life up to that was all my doing. I always ask myself what would happen if I had not called Sakura-chan to tell her Li-kun was leaving for Hong Kong, if that Fairy Tale dance had not happened, if I had not called Meiling-chan, if I had not done this and that.  
  
I decided it was useless to think about it. I decided to forget, to change, to be happy, to look at the blue skies of London, which was sometimes hidden by fog, and never look back. I had stopped wearing the things that my mother had bought for me. The dresses, the blouses, the skirts. I sometimes laughed about how I did not own one piece of clothing that was not feminine. I bought jeans, running shoes, sweatshirts and the last thing I needed to do was to cut my hair. Maybe then I felt, that I was finally going to be different and free. Not just from the feelings I had for Sakura-chan but for everything else. I was no longer going to be the best friend or someone to be relied upon. I was never again going to be the Nadeshiko that my mother wanted me to be since I was a little girl. It was like that feeling of 'finding yourself'. I looked and felt like a different person.  
  
"Do you really see the blue sky today? Do you smell the fresh air?" That was what Hiiragizawa-kun had told me. Maybe with all my wanting to change myself, I was still pretending. I was still the same person. Pretending to be happy seemed too sad to even think about. I guess even Hiiragizawa-kun had seen that in me.  
  
Funny how the more you hide the more people find you.  
  
After Hiiragizawa-kun had left the cafe, I went to that park with the ducks. I wanted to prove him wrong about me. I was not blind, I was not deaf. I was not pretending.  
  
Hiiragizawa-kun's friend sat on a park bench reading a book just like he had told me. She must have heard me as I approached because she turned around to look straight at me. At first she was unsure if I was the person she was supposed to meet. Then she stood up, waiting beside the park bench. "Hi," she said, smiling at me. "You must be Tomoyo." She stuck out her hand for me to shake. "I'm Maria."  
  
At first I did not understand why Hiiragizawa-kun had made me meet Maria. Was it because he felt I needed someone to talk to? Since he had picked me from the airport he was always there to make me feel at home in his native city. I never asked for it. Sometimes, even Mizuki-sensei came with him to take me somewhere. Was it because he thought that if I meet this person, maybe I'd find someone to make me happy? So I can see and hear again? Why did he care?  
  
Maria was small and thin. Her shiny black hair fell all the way to the middle of her back and her skin was so smooth it looked like porcelain. She was certainly beautiful with big brown eyes and small red lips. Like Hiiragizawa-kun she was Japanese and English and she spoke with an English accent. "Forgive me," she said quickly. "I don't speak Japanese too well but I'm learning."  
  
"It's all right," I said trying to smile at this beautiful person in front of me. "I can understand you just fine. You have a pretty accent."  
  
Maria smiled. Somewhere in my mind I was comparing her to Sakura- chan. Somewhere in my mind I wondered if this person will mean something to me. Will this person love me like no one had loved me before. It was really crazy for me thinking about those things when I had only met Maria for about five minutes. When I touched her hand something in me felt alive again, when I talked to her I was mesmerized. She was intelligent, sweet, and funny. She had made me laugh for the first time since I can remember. She was nothing like Sakura-chan at all. I've never met anyone like her before. Hiiragizawa-kun must have known for a long time that I just needed some kind of company. Maria liked all the things that I liked. She even said her favorite ballet was the Nutcracker.  
  
As I got to know Maria, I began to like her more and more. My feelings confused me. I was breathing air that I wasn't familiar with, my heart felt calmer and I began to finally see and hear what Hiiragizawa-kun was wanting me to see and to hear. I began to see life again don't you see... but it still was not the same. I didn't know why. My heart did not feel right.  
  
"So, you must be happy," said Hiiragizawa-kun sipping a cup of white and blueberry tea. He was sitting in front of me with his hair all over his face from the light breeze. Autumn was starting, I can almost sense it. I remembered thinking that I couldn't wait to see London in the fall. "You and Maria must be hitting it off," he continued. "I'm glad."  
  
Hiiragizawa-kun was smiling as always. He made jokes about the tea combinations, how my hair looked nicer short than it was long. "You're like how you should look," he said.  
  
"What does that mean?" I asked, confused.  
  
He shrugged. "You look like yourself, Daidouji-san."  
  
There was something about Hiiragizawa-kun that wasn't right though. Although he smiled, although he joked, there was something dark in his eyes that seemed far away and lost. I've never seen him look like that before. "Is there anything wrong?" I asked, careful not to make him uncomfortable.  
  
"Daidouji-san... what would you say if I take you to dinner. Are you busy?"  
  
He completely ignored my question. "I would like to," I told him.  
  
I guess there are some things I couldn't really explain as to what has happened to me during my first years in London, the times that I had spent with Maria, times I was spending with Hiiragizawa-kun and Mizuki- sensei.  
  
I can always tell you about my music and art classes, the girls music academy and how my mother would send me big packages every month filled with stuff I don't really need like the new toy sensation or a new brand of candy bar but I think that would be boring to you. All I can say is that life is just too hard to explain, my life anyway. I thought I was sure of things when I had arrived here. I wanted to waste away my memories of Japan and be someone that was different from the Daidouji Tomoyo that everyone has known back home. Changing yourself however is hard to do especially when you still have feelings that are still lingering in your very bones. It's hard to define that feeling . It's like love. There are different types of love. Best friend love, an ordinary love, and a love that truly defines you as a person. I thought that I had fallen in love once, the kind of love that truly defined me as a person and I was wrong at that time. I thought I had fallen in love again but it didn't feel the same. It felt like I had to love instead of wanting and feeling that love. It confused me and upset me and it hurt me.  
  
"Tomoyo, I understand." Maria told me in her usual soft comforting way. We were in the park where the ducks were, the place where we first met. She placed her hand on my cheek, her long hair had covered part of her face when she leaned over to me. I looked at her a little nervously, I had not noticed that her eyes were blue. I had always thought they were brown because they were so dark. They were almost like Hiiragizawa-kun's. "I wish to see you happy Tomoyo," Maria whispered to me. She leaned in even closer to kiss me. Her soft lips touching my own. It felt warm, that kiss. My first kiss. It was something I will never forget. You can't really forget that. She had smiled her always lovely smile when we parted. Her face with a touch of sadness but she had no tears. I think I'll always remember Maria with that face. "You promise me that I will see you happy?"  
  
I nodded. I meant it. I wanted to be happy now. Me. Just thinking of me. Like Hiiragizawa-kun had said, sometimes it's good to be selfish. A long time ago, it was enough for me to see the person that I love happy but it was time that I was. And I was prepared for it. I wanted it and needed it. I want happiness.  
  
"This is it Tomoyo, ready or not." I repeated over and over again. My new list of dreams was coming together. I smiled. How silly of me that I was sitting on a tree thinking all this and waiting. That person was coming for sure. But in the meantime, I was happy to wait. To look up at the blue sky that looked like the Pacific Ocean. This was my next step and I was ready.  
  
----------------  
  
To be continued... With Eriol's Ichiban chapter.... All the unanswered questions. And all the list of dreams. 


	6. Eriol, Tomoyo, and The Search for Happin...

Author's Notes #1: The Sixth Chapter of the ICHIBAN series. Now it's Eriol's turn to share with us a bit of his life. There's a splash of London here, a dash of Tomoyo-chan there, Suppi-chan stops by and even Nakuru. Since Eriol isn't really a Tomoeda student, this was written in third person rather than first. I think it works better for the one who always has a sly smile. So will it be a love story? Sure it will. But for whom? I can't really tell you about that. Oh! If you're a Harry Potter fan, well there's even a pinch of that in this story too.  
  
AN #2: You don't really have to read the other stories in order to get this one. Tomoyo-chan's chapter is weaved in this story so you might want to read her's first. There's even a little mention of Yamazaki-kun's story in this chapter. I wonder if you can catch it.   
  
-------Eriol, Tomoyo, and The Search for Happiness--------  
  
ICHIBAN  
  
Hiiragizawa Eriol walked along the quiet streets of his suburban neighborhood just outside the hustle and bustle of the city. Walking during the early mornings was one of the many things Eriol enjoyed doing and being Eriol, he liked doing many things even when he liked to keep these certain things on the down low. It was better to do things in a subtle manner than doing something outlandish, was his thinking. One of these things would be sneaking sweets inside Spinel Sun's lunch so the little one can be hyper all day long with big happy eyes and a pure red blush of happiness on his cheeks. That really cracked him up, even if he knew Spinel Sun would be mad and quiet all the more.  
  
"Don't you ever stop? This is not amusing anymore," said Spinel Sun with his back to him reading a newspaper. "You're too old for this."  
  
Eriol just smiled at this. Spinel Sun was always amusing whenever he was hyper and when he was angry. Eriol couldn't help it. No matter what Spinel did the creature was just cute. Eriol's eyes twinkled behind his glasses just thinking about it. "You can never be too old," he said to himself.  
  
What else did Eriol like? Well Eriol liked to write, he liked to read various books in his library, he also liked manipulating the lovely Sakura- san and Li-kun, whom he nicknamed his "cute decendent" much to Li-kun's horror. But he didn't exactly call his manipulating them "manipulating", he just loved how innocent they were to so many things. He loved to see his Cute decendant's angry red face and Sakura-san's innocent looking eyes. He still couldn't believe how they bought that chocolate story he and Yamazaki- kun came up with back when he was still in Tomoeda. He really missed those times. In fact, if he wasn't so far away, he would still do what he did best to his two favorite people. Of course, since he was older and wiser now, he was even more subtle and nonchalant in what he did, those two would still never know what hit them.  
  
Eriol also liked the autumn and the dew left on flowers during the mornings. He remembered how in the very early hours, he would be awakened by Kaho so they can see the sun rise together, then pick fresh flowers for the breakfast table. Flowers that still contained the dew beads on their petals. Kaho always made sure they saw the sunrise together because she said it symbolized another new beginning for both of them together. He wondered, as he walked along the streets that were still quiet and abandoned and sleeping, if he can still catch that sunrise again to see that new beginning and the dew drops on the flower petals.  
  
"Can I ask for a favor, Hiiragizawa-kun?" She was very quick on the phone. Right when he said hello, or rather when Nakuru answered and the phone was handed to him, she started speaking in a hurried but very polite fashion. He instantly knew who it was. Who else had a soft whispery voice that sounded so proper? She continued to explain to him about the music academy and if it was alright if can he pick her up. "But if you're going to be busy then that is all right. I can always ask one of my mother's friends that live there. It would be nice if I can see an old friend again..."  
  
If he had not stopped her from talking, she would have probably continued. "Daidouji-san, it wouldn't be a problem at all. I'll see you at the airport." He couldn't help but feel concered about that phone call. Although Daidouji-san had sent him letters before, she rarely called him. The last time he had spoken to her or seen her was in the fifth grade. How long was that now? Almost five years wasn't it?  
  
"Who was that?" Kaho was behind him, holding a tray full of biscuits and hot tea. She looked concerned.  
  
"Daidouji-san," he answered. "She's going to attend the music academy near by. She wanted to know if I can pick her up at the airport."  
  
As expected, Sakura-san called a few hours later crying on the phone while explaining what was happening. The thing was though... Sakura-san didn't really need to explain about her friend's decision to come to another country. Eriol already knew the reason and when he looked at Kaho's worried face sitting next to him by the sofa, he knew that she knew. It really wasn't hard. Both of them knew how it felt like. Maybe they had already known even when they said goodbye years ago outside the gates of his Tomoeda house. Daidouji-san certainly knew how to keep many things locked up inside her. Things that only she can ever know. Daidouji-san, even if Eriol didn't know her well enough, also knew that while everyone would also try to hide their feelings from her or from anyone else, she seemed to be the only person that can see through them like glass. When most everyone else was blind towards her, her eyes were certainly clear when it concerned everyone else. She knew his cute decendants feelings, absolutely knew Sakura-san's feelings, she even saw his own deep love for Kaho... all she had to do was look at his eyes and smiled this small gentle smile that complimented her beautiful, subtle face very well. He'll always remember that and the words she had said to him. "Hiiragizawa-kun, you have very kind eyes." He promised himself that if and when he had a chance to meet her again, he wanted to tell her the same thing. She really did have kind eyes and a kind heart even when she faced such loss and heartbreak.  
  
Days later he and Kaho waited by the arrival gates at the airport. Kaho couldn't help but be happy about seeing one of her students again and her excitement made him quite excited too even though Daidouji-san must have felt the opposite. After an hour delay, Daidouji-san walked towards the gates dragging two heavy looking lugagges and a carry-on bag. He and Kaho immediately ran to her, hugged her, then helped her with all her belongings. They said their greetings and their usual talk of flights and bad airplane food. Then Kaho immediately taking Daidouji-san in her arms once more, hugging her like a mother or sister would. Eriol always loved seeing Kaho like that, just her ability to be simple, unguarded, and happy. Daidouji-san's arrival meant a new change, he can see that in the way Daidouji-san breathed in the London air and the way she smiled. She did this in her usual subtle way but Eriol saw it and though he didn't know it then, her arrival had also given him a new outlook on life as well.  
  
As soon as Daidouji-san was situated in her own apartment, he made sure to show her around. Kaho went along with their sightseeing whenever she had free time. Often times in the beginning, Daidouji-san just stayed quiet and seemed like she was taking in everything that the city had to offer. Whenever she did decide to talk, she would gush about how different the foods were, how different chocolate tasted in England and how it tasted in Japan, she said she liked the fog that appeared in most mornings and even insisted to go to the subways with him even when he had his own car to drive around in. "It's just like Harry Potter. Maybe we'll see the infamous Platform 9 and 3/4." She laughed at that. Eriol, whom she said somewhat resembled Potter-san was even made to ask a guard if he was able to direct them to the infamous platform.  
  
The guard was not amused. "You think that's funny do you?" He scoffed. "You know how many times punks like you ask me that?"  
  
It didn't matter. Daidouji-san had laughed and he too had laughed. It was a rare moment when he was able to act his physical age and can actually express the laughter he sometimes kept inside him. It was probably a rare moment for Daidouji-san also. Back in Tomoeda whenever they had a chance to talk to each other, she gave off an aura of mystery for him. She was mature, she was very smart, spoke in a very mature way and like he already knew long before, she can see through everyone. She had a very kind heart. Didn't he also promise himself that when he was able to, he was going to tell her that she had "kind eyes" as well? He figured though that it wasn't the right time, because he was just getting to know her after all. Though Daidouji-san never talked about her feelings he knew that she was still hurting. She was trying to let go slowly and he was willing to help her with that, even if she never really asked him for the help. Like any friend, he was worried about her. Sakura-san would call, sometimes even Li- kun called to ask him about Daidouji-san and he would just say that she was doing fine. He wasn't lying about that. She really was but he can also tell that she was still hiding. She can see blue skies, see the blooming flowers but he wondered if she can really see their true beauty. Only someone that was truly happy can see and appreciate them. He learned that from Kaho because it was Kaho that made him see, when he had felt lost. That was a long time ago though, before he even went to Tomoeda, before everything happened. Back then he felt like he didn't belong anywhere. Felt like he was a tool with all these magic powers he never asked for. What good was magic when you have nothing and felt nothing? Then suddenly she came along and he was reborn. All his depressed feelings melted away and he began to live again and began to like many many things. It felt great. He wanted Daidouji-san to feel that way too. If happiness and love changed him, he was sure Daidouji-san can see that kind of happiness too.  
  
"Maybe if she can meet someone," suggested Kaho one evening. "What do you think?" She looked out into their garden and at the roses that were sure to be moistened by dew by early morning. "I mean, just a friend you know. Someone that she can talk to. She must miss... I mean, she can always talk to us but I think she needs someone different from us..." Kaho found it difficult to explain but he knew what she meant and he knew the perfect someone.  
  
Maria was one of his very old friends who used to live next door to him. She would come over sometimes and was always so inquisitive about everything that looked strange in his house, which if you think about it, was pretty much everything. She especially like Spinel Sun who had to pretend to be some creature called a cat which to Spinel Sun, was like an abomination. She also liked talking to Nakuru who was always happy because Maria was cute and anything cute and sweet Nakuru liked. He liked Maria's company, like Daidouji-san she was also smart, very polite, and had a gift for music. She can play the flute and was studying classical opera. They would certainly hit it off for sure. Well at least he hoped so and as soon as he told Maria about Daidouji-san she agreed.  
  
"I think it would be interesting," she said.  
  
The next day, he knew instantly where to find Daidouji-san, well with a little help from what little magic he had left, that is. He caught sight of Daidouji-san sitting alone, reading a book outside a tea house called The Mystery Tea Leaf. He thought the name was quite odd, but he had passed the place once before. In fact, Kaho was talking about how the back of the building had a shrine where various tea leaves of mysterious orgin were scattered everywhere for decoration and that they should visit one day.  
  
"I have a friend," he said putting a hand on her shoulder. She immediately jumped in surprise. He sat down on the chair across from her, taking a drink from her tea cup. It was an odd combination he thought but it did taste interesting and sweet. He gave her his usual smile hoping that she'll agree to meet Maria. Though she returned his smile, she still continued to being her usual quiet, open, yet hiding self. It was just like Daidouji-san to pretend like that when she should know that he can see through her already and understand her. It wasn't that hard to understand her. She was just like him in someways, he can admit to that. She looked scared and nervous.  
  
"Really, if you don't mind Hiiragizawa-kun, I would like to be alone so I can study."  
  
So she still isn't able to let go after all, he was thinking. "You and I are the same in many ways. A long time ago I thought only seeing the one that was important to me... I thought just watching them smile was enough happiness for me to live on. But Daidouji-san, that's not true is it? Just watching isn't enough is it? Maybe it's being selfish, maybe it's another reason but it's not enough just to see them happy. Those reasons are selfish too, Daidouji-san. Do you realize that? Because it's running away too isn't it? Daidouji-san, are you really happy this way? Do you really see the blue sky today? Do you smell the fresh air? Do you really hear the birds chirping on that tree? Do you see the flowers that are blooming in those trees?"  
  
Those were the only words he was able to say to her. He wanted to say more, comfort her, say something... anything, just to see her really smile, like the kind she used everytime she was in the presence of Sakura-san. When her face glowed and her eyes twinkled. That was how he remembered her and he didn't want that to disappear. He wanted to tell her that too but he sighed and just walked away again. Hoping, maybe wishing, that she'll stop pretending and hiding behind a smile.  
  
Like any friend he was worried. He wondered, as he walked that long way back to his house if Daidouji-san had decided to meet Maria after all. "Those two would be good together," he told Kaho.  
  
"You're not trying to be match maker again are you?" Kaho asked, with a slight smile on her face. "Remember the last time you played that role? You completely got it all wrong."  
  
Yes. Yes. He remembered that one. How can he ever forget that? He completely almost changed not only Sakura-san's destiny, but Tsukishiro- san's and his cute decendant's as well. Their lives would have been completely different if they had not followed their own true destiny but followed the one he made for them instead. "I'm really glad I got that one wrong," he said.  
  
"Well, I wonder if they really did meet though." Kaho said. "I miss Daidouji-san's happy face."  
  
He agreed but he was pretty sure Daidouji-san was out to prove him wrong. She was not the kind of person that can be beaten down by words. He hoped that their meeting was a pleasant one. He still was always worried about her. Though he knew that Daidouji-san can take care of herself, he felt like it was his responsibility to look out for her too. Even after she called to thank him about having her meet Maria, he still worried, as any friend. "I'm still here if you need me, Daidouji-san," he told her.  
  
"I know," she said. "Thank you for taking care of me."  
  
Before he knew it, as quickly as the sun would rise and set, a year had passed. Daidouji-san's first year at the academy had gone on without any problems. Despite the uniform the girls had to wear at the academy, whenever he went out to lunch with her or went with her for a cup of tea at their usual place at The Mystery Tea Leaf, Eriol saw how much she had changed even from the clothes she was wearing. If she wasn't wearing the uniform, she instead wore jeans and t-shirts, sweatshirts and jean jackets. It was a far cry from the clothing she always wore that made her look to him as a very proper lady. Now she looked like her age. She looked very young and alive. He was happy for her and loved spending time with her, if she weren't busy being with Maria of course. Still... there was still something sad about Daidouji-san. Something he really couldn't pinpoint. Was she still afraid to let go?  
  
Being with Daidouji-san also made him feel young. For Eriol, it seemed he never really had a childhood. Things went too quickly for him. He was always the grown up even when he had that quirky streak in him that loved to trick Spinel Sun and others without them suspecting him. Then again, Spinel Sun was so used to it, he knew that Eriol was the only culprit. But he wanted something more than that. How old was he supposed to be now? About seventeen wasn't it? He wanted, maybe just once in his life to run around, to go to a concert, to go to Buckingham Palace and chastise the stone faced guards until they squirm. He was never much of a child at all, never had a childhood and Daidouji-san made him feel like his age even if it's just for the afternoon. Once in awhile if they were feeling especially silly, they would still ask the various subway guards where Platform 9 and 3/4 was or if they've seen a lost owl named Hedwig because he lost it while buying tokens.  
  
The guard would always say the same thing. "You think that's funny do you? Do you know how many punks like you ask me that?" They were always different guards but they always say the same thing. Sometimes it was even funnier to hear the guard's response or witness their reactions than pretending to be some kind of Hogwarts student because Eriol didn't look like much of a punk at all. How can such a straight laced young person wearing dress pants and a sweater with a nicely pressed shirt and tie underneath, ask such silly questions in such a serious straight laced way?  
  
It was just liberating he supposed. He felt like laughing out loud which he has never done before. Daidouji-san's laughter, although there was still something missing behind it all, was contagious. He couldn't help but join her. She was still in her old habit of covering her mouth while she laughed, that polite way of doing things but he didn't care. It felt pretty good to be a teenager. He just wished that Daidouji-san would one day fill that something missing in her. He wished he can fill it up whatever that missing piece was. Was it really that painful? He always asked himself that whenever he was with her. Of course it was. He understood that later on.  
  
"Eriol, where have you been?" As soon as he got home, Kaho was asking him questions. She looked worried yet mad at the same time and Kaho was never mad. "Don't you remember what we were supposed to do tonight? I mean, it doesn't matter to me, but you could have said something."  
  
"I was with Daidouji-san," he simply said. "I'm sorry."  
  
"You've been spending a lot of time with her lately." She looked away. Eriol noticed that she was dressed to go out but then she started to take her hair down, looking at herself in the mirror that hung in the hallway. She started to take her makeup off and her coat. "I've been waiting for tonight. I was really excited. It's been awhile since I've seen a musical. Since we went out together."  
  
Eriol didn't know what to say. He can apologize and apologize but it wouldn't really make a difference. He was completely forgetting everything. It wasn't like him.What was happening exactly? He watched Kaho walk towards the garden. From the open doorway he can see that the moon had shone through the black sky like a bright spotlight. Stars spread out everywhere. Kaho always liked sitting out in their garden especially at night so she can see the constellations. It was a Japanese garden that he had designed especially for her because he remembered how much she admired them. He took his sweater off and loosened his tie, following her lead. She was sitting on a bench with her back to him. Her long red hair shining in the moonlight. He wanted to say something. Anything really. That he was stupid for forgetting, that he got caught up, that he'd make everything better. Yet, he and Kaho knew each other so well that he didn't need to say that but he found himself not moving any closer to even comfort her. He leaned against the doorframe waiting for her to say something.  
  
"Where do you go whenever you're with her?" She asked softly, without looking at him.  
  
He sighed, staring at his shoes. "Daidouji-san just needs a friend. I want to be there for her."  
  
"So you're making her happy?"  
  
"But it's nothing like that. She's missing something. I want to know what that is."  
  
"And you think you can fulfill that?"  
  
"I just want to try."  
  
"Eriol, you can't make everyone happy just like that. They have to feel it for themselves." He was waiting for her to turn around, to look at him. He wanted to look at her face, her eyes. He wanted to say something... yet he just couldn't do it.  
  
For all the years he had known Kaho, he was always sure about his feelings for her. All he had to do was look at her smile or the way she talked about her students so passionately or even when she would often times forget where she placed her things, it was just there. Those feelings so full and so alive that he always felt very complete. He can remember years before when he had doubts about their relationship. Sometimes when they went out together, people would give them their usual stares, their usual whispers, their usual snickers. They thought Kaho was his mother or his sister or anyone other than who she really was. Because of those things, he had many doubts. Why on earth did she ever decide to be with him. She was this beautiful, smart, and caring woman and yet here he was stuck inside a body of a child. Those were the days when he was very unsure of himself, about who he was, before he really "lived", before he appeared in Tomoeda.  
  
What did she say to him then? "Don't think about it," her voice was soft and sweet, her eyes understanding. "I knew it was going to be you before I ever met you. I'll wait for you, Eriol. Even if it's forever."  
  
Now that he was older, seventeen now was it? He was taller then her, he actually looked like someone that can really be with her. Those stares and whispers were gone. Kaho never even aged. She looked like the same woman he met long ago. Always understanding, always kind, always aloof and forgetful. Always Kaho. Why then, did he find it so difficult to speak to her? It seemed like the life he was leading before Daidouji-san arrived, seemed so very different from the life he was leading now that he was spending time with her. Maybe it was because they were the same "age", they had the same interests, they even had the same odd quirks, like finding enjoyment in embarassing Sakura-san and Li-kun and liked the same little things like tea combinations. Other than Maria and his days in Tomoeda, he never really spent time with anyone that was the age he was supposed to be. Maybe it was the experience of being young was what he wanted. He didn't know. His feelings were all over the place. He wanted Daidouji-san to be happy, he wanted Kaho happy. HE wanted to be happy. But what did it really take for him to achieve all that? He thought he was already happy but now he just wasn't sure. He had to question his feelings which he had never done before. He kept staring at Kaho's back, her hair turning silver violet from the light of the moon.  
  
"You know," he said, after a long silence. "You never wake me up anymore to see the sunrise."  
  
"That's because you look too peaceful to wake up. Besides, I figured you don't really like that stuff anymore."  
  
"Why would you think that?"  
  
"Because you're never really home anymore. I don't know..." She sighed, looking up at the stars. "I don't know where you go, I don't know what you do, you never really talk to me anymore. I mean, really talk to me. Even Suppi-chan and Nakuru-san wonder about you. But even so, even with all that, I look at you and I've never seen you happier."  
  
He was silent, sliding down to the floor, his back against the door frame. The house was dark, quiet, the only light was from the moon and street lamps that can be seen over their high hedges. He wondered where Spinel Sun and Nakuru had disappeared to but he didn't ask. "It's just Daidouji-san, that's all. There's nothing to worry about." He whispered to himself and to her.  
  
"It's not your responsibility to make her happy. She has to do that on her own. You can't help everyone."  
  
"That's just it, Kaho." What was he trying to say? Why was he feeling so hopeless? "That's not the only reason. Whenever I'm with her, whenever I am around her, I feel happy too. Just like you said." He shook his head. Of all things, why was he telling Kaho all this, when it hurt him to even spill it out. "I don't know what I'm talking about."  
  
"Eriol... do you... have feelings for her?" She said it so quietly, so slowly that he wasn't even sure if he heard it right. It was so unexpected, just out of the blue.  
  
"What?" He asked, so startled that even his voice cracked.  
  
"Have you fallen in love with her?"  
  
"Of course not." He said quickly. "What kind of question is that?"  
  
"Are you sure?" She finally turned his way but it was so dark he can only see part of her face. Only her hair still glowed like some kind of hailo.  
  
"Why do you even question it?" His voice cracked again. Why was she even asking? She already knew the answer to that. She was the only one forever, the only one he thought about.  
  
"I can sense it in you. I can sense your confusion. I can sense your doubts. I know you like a book."  
  
"If you know me like that, then you should know it's just you that I..." He stopped. He couldn't even see her face anymore. What was he trying to say? She was wrong for sure. She didn't know what she was talking about. If you know me so well... he wanted to say... why are you doubting me? But more than that, why was he doubting himself? All of a sudden he didn't know how to feel and what to say. What she was saying couldn't really be the truth, but if it wasn't, then why did he stop when he was about to say that she was the only one for him?  
  
She walked towards him. "Whatever your doubts Eriol, I hope you'll find the answer. After all, all I want is for you to be happy." Without another word, she went inside the dark house. Her faint perfume lingered in the air when she passed him. They smelled of wild flowers, a smell that was just distinctively hers. Kaho's high heels clicked further away on the wooden floors. He sat there, his back still against the door frame listening to the sound until he couldn't hear it anymore.  
  
The next morning when he went to look for her, she was gone. Only a plain white note was left on his nightstand. "The sunrise is beautiful. I hope you'll catch it once again." He turned the note around to see if she had written more. He knew though that she had not. Just looking for more than what was there made him not want to think about what really was there. He couldn't even think straight. It took him a long time to even get out of bed. The sick feeling of emptiness stuck to him and pricked at him all over his body. It took him even longer to get out of the house.  
  
"You have to get out of here, Idiot!" Nakuru yelled at him, from the open door way of the library. It was the first time Nakuru ever became commanding. Usually it was Spinel Sun who said things like that to him.  
  
"Leave me alone," he said.  
  
"Stop wallowing like an idiot. You're the one who did this to yourself. Go on. Decide what you think is right. You're so insistant on wanting everyone else to be happy yet you can't even decide what your happiness is." Nakuru left him, without even giving him a time to respond. Next time, he told himself, if he had another chance to create another creature, he would definitely make sure that the creature won't be able to talk back or yell at him about things he didn't want to face. Nakuru was right though. He needed to answer his doubts or else he just couldn't live with himself anymore.  
  
He met Daidouji-san at The Mystery Tea Leaf.  
  
"So, you must be happy," he told her while sipping a cup of white and blueberry tea. "You and Maria must be hitting it off." He gave her a small smile, all the while he couldn't help but think about how much prettier she was, sitting there in front of him. She had cut her hair short, the ends just touching her shoulders. She was certainly different from the last time he had seen her. She seemed revived, full of life. She seemed very happy, the very opposite of what he was feeling.  
  
"Maria and I..." she paused. She put her tea cup down, blotting the corners of her mouth with a napkin. "Well, I still need to see if this is right for me. I mean... she told me she understands. I'm not sure exactly how to explain it."  
  
He looked sorry he ever said anything. "I'm sorry, I didn't know."  
  
"No, no..." She put her head to the side and smiled. Really smiled. Something Eriol observed was different from the smile that she had given him in the past. This was a smile that was somewhat happy. "It's not something to apologize for. I think I just need to let go of some things... that's all. I just want to know. I want to know if it's really love or if it's something else. I want to feel it in my heart." She smiled again, drinking her tea. "Anyway... that's just how I feel I guess..." Her eyes focused on him. "How about you? How are you Hiiragizawa-kun?"  
  
"You changed your hairstyle," he said instead. Pretending he did not hear her question. How soft her face was, how delicate her hands were. Even when she was wearing jeans with holes in them and a black leather jacket, she still couldn't help but act like a lady. "You're like how you should look."  
  
She looked confused but gave him a small laugh that she hid behind her hand. "What does that mean?"  
  
He shrugged. "You look like yourself, Daidouji-san." He wasn't lying, she really did.  
  
"Thank-you," another small, comfortable, beautiful laughter hidden behind a soft, porcelain-like, hand. "I guess." She was watching him, observing him. Again she asked him a question he didn't want to answer. She asked it slowly, carefully as to not make him uncomfortable. "Is there anything wrong?"  
  
Again, he ignored it. "Daidouji-san... what would you say if I take you to dinner?" He asked quickly, instead.  
  
"I would like to," she answered.  
  
It's been months since he'd been out, so when Daidouji-san had accepted his invitation he was relieved. He waited for her outside the restaurant that was near his house and the music academy. "So we don't have to drive around so much," she said. It was autumn and a bit cold. He breathed in the fresh nippy air, which instantly filled his insides with such comfort even though he was still lost and very empty. The only times he felt alive was when he was with Daidouji-san. But that feeling of being alive... it just felt different. His heart still hurt, he still couldn't sleep, even just the simple things like looking out his bedroom window at night or the slight breeze that made his curtains wave gently in the night, made him think about... It's always the little things, he thought sadly.  
  
"Hiiragizawa-kun! There you are!" Daidouji-san was walking towards him, waving her hand. "I'm sorry I'm late."  
  
"It's no problem," he said, trying to smile his usual gentle smile. "I just got here myself."  
  
"You look great," Daidouji-san always managed to compliment everyone even though she was the one that looked beautiful. With her short hair in curls, her black dress shining in the dark. Does she know how wonderful she really is?  
  
"Daidouji-san, you look very beautiful."  
  
They spend their dinner by candle light. Laughing at old jokes and the old days of when everyone was in Tomoeda. Yamazaki-kun's tall tales, class plays that were penned by Naoko-chan. Daidouji-san even told him the story about the two sided coin with plus signs on them that he had given to Yamazaki-kun as a goodbye gift. "He used it against Chiharu-chan once during this dance we had. Chiharu-chan was really happy." Eriol smiled. He knew that no one else BUT Yamazaki-kun could put something like that to good use.  
  
"Hiiragizawa-kun?" Daidouji-san touched his arm as soon as they stepped outside after their dinner was over.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Let's go to that shrine behind The Mystery Tea Leaf, what do you say?"  
  
He agreed. They found a taxi right away that took them there in less than ten minutes. It swerved in and out of traffic, going to alleys, breaking and speeding. It seemed almost comical but they got there alive and well. The driver happy to drop them off because they were his last customers after a long day and night.  
  
The shrine behind The Mystery Tea Leaf seemed quiet and forlorn. Two other couples were there other than them. It looked just like any shrine that were scattered all over Tokyo, except it had that touch of western flair. Orange lanterns lighting the whole place making everything, even their clothes and skin turn into some dark orange hue. A lone flute soundtrack played through an invisible speaker system. Tea leaves of mysterious orgin scattered everywhere looking like fallen leaves. For some reason, the place reminded Eriol of an old time black and white painting. The shrine looked very lonely. He was almost expecting a crow to come down to eat the scattered tea leaves.  
  
He followed Daidouji-san to a small man made pond where its wooden bottom were filled with coins. "Let's make a wish," he said to her, handing her a coin.  
  
They made silent wishes, closing their eyes, their hands clasped together. It was getting dark, the half moon so bright that its vivid reflection showed through the pond like an upside down smile or a slice of an apple. It seemed like you can grab it just like that, like how Narcissus tried to grab his own beautiful reflection.  
  
"Daidouji-san.... " Eriol said softly, still looking at the reflection of the moon. "You know... Kaho left me."  
  
From the corner of his eye, he can see the reaction on her face when she turned to look at him. "I'm sorry," came her whispered reply.  
  
"You shouldn't apologize. It isn't your fault." Eriol still focused his gaze on the moon's reflection. "It's strange isn't it? I feel like a hypocrite. Here I am telling you how you should find that happiness, yet I can't even find the answers to my own."  
  
"Everyone has doubts, Hiiragizawa-kun, it's just that one day, the right one will be there and you won't feel those doubts anymore. You'll feel it in your heart." She moved in closer to him, her short hair covering her profile as she looked down at the pond. "I learned to live with that concept."  
  
"It was you, Daidouji-san. Somewhere in my heart, I thought I really loved you."  
  
"Somewhere in my heart, I thought I fell in love with you too." She said this with such a soft voice that if she wasn't standing right next to him, he wouldn't have heard. "I thought I was crazy."  
  
"I wanted to be sure. That's why I asked you to be here."  
  
"That's why I said yes."  
  
"Daidouji-san, since you came here, you made me see another side of myself that I never knew existed.... You see, I was always an adult. Treated and acted like an adult, I didn't know any other way. I was a child but I never was one. I didn't even know how to handle it. When I'm with you, I want to laugh out loud. I want to scream and run around. I've never done that before. It felt great and everytime I did those things with you, everytime I heard you laugh, I wanted to hear that more and more. I fell in love with you just by you being like that because I was never like that."  
  
"But its because of you that I was able to do that as well. If I was by myself, I would never dare go up to those guards and tell them old Harry Potter jokes. I guess in away... I fell in love with you because you were like that. You had the guts. So polite, yet you have that dark streak. I want that. How do you do it?" She smiled at him. Ah, yet another smile that wasn't hiding anything. He was glad he saw it yet again.  
  
Eriol smiled back. "That's a secret." He reached out to take her hand in his. "I'm glad I told you."  
  
"Hiiragizawa-kun, you know... I don't think you ever doubted. You knew all along who you loved, didn't you? You just liked the fun. That dark streak in you just wanted to be let out." She made Eriol laugh for the first time, in a long time.  
  
"No, that's not true. I do love you Daidouji-san. I'm glad I got to know you even more. I'm glad I was able to become your friend. I've never met anyone quite like you."  
  
"You're lucky you know," she said, rummaging through her purse, looking for something. "Mizuki-sensei loves you so much that she was willing to let you go. And you love her so much that you can't even think of replacing her. I can see that in you, Hiiragizawa-kun. You've never doubted. Whenever I mention her name, your face lights up. You talk about her with so much feeling. It's just like Sakura-chan and Li-kun. Everytime I look at them, they look like you do now." She handed him a folded piece of white paper that seemed to be folded over and over again and read many times.  
  
"What's this?" He asked.  
  
"My list of dreams. I made it before I left Tomoeda." She waited for him to open it up. "You see, I thought that I had fallen in love once, the kind of love that truly defined me as a person and I was wrong at that time. I thought I had fallen in love again," another smile from her. "But it didn't feel the same. It felt like I had to love instead of wanting and feeling that love. It confused me and upset me and it hurt me... But now I understand it. I think we both do."  
  
Eriol didn't know what to say. He unfolded the piece of paper, looking at her list, each one of them with a check mark next to it, completed and achieved. Except for the last. "To achieve happiness with the one I love," he read, then looked at her. "I hope that you do. If there was anyone in the world who can fulfill this dream, it would be you."  
  
"It's time for both of us to fulfill that dream." She opened her other hand to show him an unused eraser. "But you already achieved that a long time ago, huh?"  
  
Eriol smiled. "What is that?" He asked, looking at the eraser she was holding. "A symbol to erase the past?"  
  
Daidouji-san gave a small giggle. "Funny. You know you can't erase the past. But you can learn to let go, right?" She gently traced the dark letters of the eraser. "You see, this is my most treasured possession. Sakura-chan gave it to me in the fourth grade. After that, she became my best friend. It's still the one thing that I hold dear to me." Ever so slowly, she brought the eraser to her lips to kiss, then dropped it in the pond, it gave off one tiny sound, like one lone water droplet falling from a faucet. It sank slowly until it reached the wooden bottom. "So I'll always know that my wish will come true, ne?" All of a sudden, he felt a small butterfly kiss on his cheek. "Ganbate, Hiiragizawa-kun."  
  
"Ganbate," he hugged her tightly. "You always have such kind eyes, Daidouji- san, I really hope you'll find happiness."  
  
The next day, Eriol wondered, as he walked along the streets that were still quiet and abandoned and sleeping, if he can still catch that sunrise again someday to see that new beginning and the dew drops on the flower petals. He wondered if he was too late. The sun was still dim, not yet over the horizon.  
  
"Was the sunrise beautiful?" He asked, when he arrived. He stayed a few paces behind her. She was leaning against a tree, its yellow folliage like an umbrella that draped over her. "I'm sorry I was too late."  
  
"You missed it by mere seconds." She said.  
  
"I was afraid that I would never see you again."  
  
"I'm always here catching the sunrise."  
  
"When you left, I felt like I wasn't real anymore. When you left, I felt empty. I want to never change anything again. I love you. I loved you since the day I met you. That's all I can say."  
  
"That's all you have to say," she said. "I understand. I told you before. I'll wait for you, even if it's forever."  
  
He went to her placing his hand on her warm, soft cheek. "You don't have to wait anymore." He leaned down to kiss her, the feel of her mouth against his was like heaven, soft, tender, warm, he wanted it to last forever... just kissing her there with the sun slowly rising. This was what he lived for. How his heart felt full again and so complete. How her faint wild flower scent felt like home, like warmth filling him up with every kind of emotion, of every kind of love. Being with her, being this close, was what he always wanted. The very meaning of his own kind of happiness.  
  
--------  
  
Fate as you know it can come in many different ways. As Eriol and Kaho walked home hand in hand, they decided to stop by at the park, the place where the ducks swam freely. Up on a tree they saw a smiling Daidouji-san looking up at the blue blue sky, lost in her own thoughts whatever that may be. A blue bird right next to her.  
  
Fate as you know it can come any time and as they looked to see who was coming to also see the ducks that swam on the pond was Maria reading a book completely oblivious to anything around her, for if she wasn't so lost in her reading she would notice that there was someone up on a tree right above her trying to catch a blue bird.  
  
Eriol smiled. What an opportunity he thought. For he was also thinking of Fate and how funny it was sometimes. He closed his eyes. Twitched his lips a little and then...  
  
"Tomoyo?"  
  
"Maria?" Tomoyo didn't know what happened. Suddenly she was up on that tree, the next, she was falling, landing on top of Maria. "You broke my fall." She said.  
  
"Jeez. I thought that was it for me. Dead, just like that. What were you doing up there?"  
  
"I was looking up at the sky and then I saw a bird. Then I fell. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Are you hurt anywhere?"  
  
"Not really, but I thought all of a sudden God had it out for me and sent an angel to take me to heaven or something."  
  
Tomoyo smiled. "Maybe you're not really wrong on that part."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
From where they stood, Eriol and Kaho can hear the light laughter of Daidouji-san.  
  
Kaho let go of his hand, smiling in a playful way, her eyes accusing. "You didn't by any chance go and make her fall did you? That same thing happened once before."  
  
Eriol kissed her on the cheek, "I don't know what you're talking about," he said, with a smile on his face, his eyes twinkling behind his glasses. He took her hand in his again and headed for home. "Really, why would I do a thing like that?"  
  
--------------  
  
AN #3: Well, that's it. Eriol's story with a little bit of Tomoyo. I know a lot of people who read this are probably disappointed that it isn't a TxE love story but honestly, I tried to write one but I just couldn't do it. One because I can't see it. Two because if you read those pages of the 12th manga volume at all, Eriol is completely in love with Kaho and only Kaho. Even Tomoyo saw it and she even told him. I can't see Eriol and Tomoyo together even in a fanfiction world and though they may look good together and probably have a lot of things similar with each other, they just aren't right in connecting with each other in my opinion and if I ever write about them ending up together somehow, they would be way too OOC. So Kaho and Eriol it is. I hope those of you who read this will like it none the less.  
  
AN #4: I doubt that erasers sink when you throw it in a pond but hey its my story so it sinks. Maybe Eriol had put a spell on it to make it sink as well.   
  
Only Rika, Chiharu, and Syaoran are left. So I wonder who will be next. Thank you for your comments with this series of mine that started in 2001. Your comments and emails have been a great motivation for me to keep going.  
  
Cindy 


End file.
